


The Sensational Feeling

by Midnight_Grace



Category: Fifth Harmony (Band), Halsey (Musician)
Genre: Angst, Cliffhangers, Depression, Drama, F/F, I just had a moment in my life where I just randomly shipped these two, Multi, This isn't a particularly happy fic but I make sure there is at least someee good moments, buckle up bitches, halren, i mean that politely lolll, mature topics, music industry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-05
Updated: 2019-02-05
Packaged: 2019-10-23 01:49:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 27,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17674121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Midnight_Grace/pseuds/Midnight_Grace
Summary: What starts off as two people that are fans of each other's work turns into an odd sensation. One that makes the other complete and finally able to let go of the weight they carry. Having a career in the music industry was no joke and both Lauren and Halsey knew this, but when the music industry dives into darker and more controlling territory in Laurens life how will she manage it. Can she stop her life from spiraling? What will she do to stop it or Who will she turn to, to find peace? ... basically this is an angsty fic loll





	1. Strangers

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so if you have Wattpad then the chances of you reading this might be high. I originally had posted this on Wattpad and its still there I just wanted to upload it on this platform cause this fic was my first one ever and it holds a special place in my heart and I'm trying to figure out if I should continue. Lol so basically it's been more than a year that I've updated this but hey better late than never. So if anyone is actually interested in seeing me continue this leave me a comment? Also just leave me a comment whenever love hearing peoples thoughts. Last thing I'm kinda likeeee an asshole writer so if you don't like your emotions getting played with then you should probably look elsewhere lol. Hope you guys enjoy!

*2015*

Lauren POV

I was getting ready for tonight's show when I checked my twitter for a second. I didn't often check it because I was usually always busy with the tour and any down time I did get I spent it sleeping or drawing but today was different suddenly I had the urge to get on. I go on and everything seems to be the usual fans were tweeting, I took some time to reply to some but as much I wished I could reply to everyone there was to many people. I scrolled through my feed and realized just why I don't really go on social media celebrities I'm following are tweeting about nothing I care about and nothing interesting seemed to be happening. I decided to check my messages and saw one that caught my eye. It was a message from Halsey, I've always been a huge fan she seemed so cool and down to earth and I loved her music. I didn't know why she would ever message me I mean I'm just a girl in this girl group. I open the message and smile when I read it.

*Hey I'm Halsey just wanted to say I really love your music and I think your such a great singer and cool person, ohh god I'm rambling on, I just wanted you to know if your gonna be in La I would love 4 you to come by the tour. I'll hook you up with tickets 😉.*

I started to freak out, I can't believe this happened Halsey knew who I was and she wanted me to come see her. I got my composure together and typed back.

*Omg that's so amazing I love you and your music too. That would be so awesome if I could come to your show, do u mind if I bring someone*

I read the message over and over again making sure there are no spelling mistakes or that she seems desperate or crazy.

*No POV*

She finds herself with her finger hovering over the send button. She closes her eyes and quickly presses the send button. She then turns off her phone gets up off the tour bus couch and goes outside to check up on the girls but she can't help but smile on her way out.  
She heads to the sound check area to see the other girls.

Dinah: Oh look who's coming  
Normani: hey where were you  
Lauren: I was just in the tour bus why did I miss anything

The huge grin on her face didn't go unnoticed by the other girls

Dinah: Now why are you all smiley all the sudden, have something to tell us Lauren  
Lauren: Nope

She shrugs her shoulders and moves past them. Dinah and Normani look at each other and grin. They skip towards Lauren.

Normani: Are you sure about that because you do seem all happy all the sudden anything happen that we need to know about  
Dinah: Or someone

Normani playfully hits Dinah. While Lauren just rolls her eyes and continues on. She puts in her earpiece to make sure everything is going correctly. But she doesn't stop smiling.

*Lauren POV*

Man I'm tired, I can't believe the crowd tonight. They sung like every song with us. Ally shook her head and smiled. The girls all gathers in the "living room" area of the tour bus when the tour manager came in.

Manager: So Lauren Halsey just called us and told us about your plans. We gave her your phone number so she can talk to you directly.  
Dinah:What! Why didn't you tell us you know halsey  
Normani: Omg seriously Lauren you know halsey

I felt my face get hot and my cheeks hurt from smiling to much. I was about to answer them when out of nowhere I get a phone call.

*No POV*  
She doesn't recognize the number, but she picks up anyways. She's shocked when it's Halsey on the other end. She quickly gets up exits the loud room and goes into the back room and shuts the door. Normani and Dinah pick up quick that it's someone they don't know somehow and are intrigued to find out who Lauren's talking to.

*Hey um hi* She puts her hand on her face when only that comes out Halsey laughs *Your cute, So I just wanted to call you since you didn't answer any of the messages I sent you* Lauren blushes then realized Halsey said she messaged her. Lauren went back on twitter to see 8 messages from Halsey

(8 New Messages)  
*Okay you got a deal, did you only want to bring one friend*

*Is silence a Yes or a No can't really tell from this end*

*Hello earth to Lauren you still here*

*Im just gonna keep messaging you till you pick up lalalalala*

*Helllllllo it's your captain speaking ready to take flight for La are we missing anyone oh wait Lauren and friends lol*

*Lalalallalalalalala just waiting for a Ms. Jauregui*

*I swear sometimes I just have to much time on my hands ha*

*I'll call you later tonight okay, please pick up TTYL 😘*

*No POV*

Lauren was shocked by the amount of messages *Omg I'm so sorry I left my phone in the tour bus and didn't get back to it till the end of the show, which is well now* She felt nervous hoping she didn't mess things up with Halsey or make her upset. Instead Halsey just laughed it off *Its okay I expected Lauren Jauregui from Fifth Harmony to be busy* Lauren giggled and rolled her eyes *Well I'd expect that from the Amazing Halsey as well*

(Few Minutes Earlier)

Lauren enters the room.  
Dinah: Who is she talking to.  
Normani: I don't know why don't we find out.  
Ally: Don't you guys ever think listening in on people's conversation is invasive. (Continuing to look at her phone while on the tour bus couch)  
Normani and Dinah: simultaneously say No and go to put their ears against the door.  
Normani: Hmm she seems nervous don't you think.  
Dinah: Ya totally you know maybe it's the person that was making her smile all day.  
Normani: We have to find out who it is.

Ally rolls her eyes and continues to play on her phone. Normani and Dinah hear giggling coming from the room and flirty banter.

Dinah: Omg she's totally seeing somebody who do you think it could be  
Normani: Wait shut up so I can see if I can hear a name

They make sure the tour bus is silent and Normani closes both eyes and presses her ear on the door. She hears Lauren say Halsey name and Normani gasps.

Dinah: What who is it  
Normani:It's Halsey  
Ally:Halsey what  
Dinah: Thought you said you shouldn't listen to other people's conversations

Ally rolls her eyes and sticks her tongue out at Dinah. Normani and Dinah continue to listen to Lauren's conversation

Camila: hey what are you guys doing  
Dinah: shhh we're trying to hear  
Ally: Their spying on Lauren  
Dinah: Hey you were to  
Ally: No I wasn't, I was spying on you guys  
Normani: Guys be quiet so I can here  
Camila: You guys shouldn't be doing that you know how Lauren gonna react when she finds out you were listening to her conversation  
Normani: That's if she finds out

Camila and Ally sat on the couch and tried their best to ignore the other girls because they knew they would get in trouble. Normani and Dinah were still by the door with their ears pressed against the door trying to listen to as much of the conversations they could hear.

*Lauren POV*

(Present)

I laughed at my own joke and so did she, for someone who was basically a stranger I sure felt like we've been friends for a long time. It probably because we are both pretty down to earth. *Haha okay you got me there I'm not as busy as it seems I make sure I all ways have some down time to talk to friends and family or just relax* I smiled I wish I could manage my time better and keep in touch with family and friends . But I just don't know how to do it. *Lucky my schedule is crazy and any time I do get off I end up just falling asleep, I guess I'm not use to the tour life yet* It was crazy to me that I was actual talking to Halsey and having an actual normal conversation. *Yeah well if anyone could solve all their problem it would be the talented Lauren Jauregui* I smile, giggle and blush, I haven't felt this great in so long. *Stop your gonna end up making my head explode before I can even meet you* *Oh well we don't want that do we, I actually really can't wait to see you* My heart beats fast like it's fluttering and I start getting sweaty palms and a hot face. *Well I can't wait to meet you too* There's a small moment of silence then I hear Halsey breath and it send shivers down my back for some reason. *So do you have anyone in mind that you want to take* I think in my head I haven't really thought about it. I just I knew I wanted to take someone in case this whole meeting ends up going wrong. *Um I'm actually not sure who I want to take* I was cut off by the sound of scratching or low banging at the door. I stand up and pull the door open and both Normani and Dinah fall into the room.

Lauren: What are you doing?  
Halsey:What?  
Lauren:Sorry not you, um can I call you back in a bit  
Halsey: Sure just make sure you call me back  
Lauren: yeah definitely I'll talk to you later okay promise

*No Pov*

Lauren sighed hung up and stared at Normani and Dinah on the floor, she gave them a sort of deathly stare that was a mix of I'm gonna kill the both of you and I can't deal with you two right now. Normani and Dinah both looked like they pissed off a tiger and now fear for their life's.

Normani and Dinah: We didn't mean to, I mean we did but sorry sorry please don't get mad  
Lauren: I'm already mad, what are you guys doing  
Ally: Spying on you

Normani and Dinah both look back at Ally with astonishment they couldn't believe she had just ratted them out.

Normani and Dinah: Ally!  
Ally: What I'm just telling the truth  
Camila: Ya they were totally spying on your conversation, I told them not to but they didn't listen.  
Lauren: uhh I can't believe you guys, did you guys get what you wanted  
Normani: I mean yes we know you were talking to Halsey how long have you guys been friends  
Camila:What you now Halsey

Lauren rolls her eyes and puts her hand on her forehead as if she had a headache.

Lauren: No I don't know Halsey we just met, well not met but talked  
Normani: really? Seemed like you've known her for awhile  
Lauren: What? No! Were practically strangers, anyways does anyone want to come with me to the Halsey concert in La  
Normani and Dinah: oooo I want to go  
Ally: I wish I could but I'm gonna be with family  
Camila: Same but hope you guys have fun  
Normani: Yay we're going to a Halsey concert

Lauren can't help but glare at them one last time.

Lauren: Stop spying on me, now I'm gonna go back in that room and call Halsey and tell her who's going okay

Normani and Dinah nod their heads and sit on the couch across from Ally and Camila. Lauren walks back in the room slows her heart rate down and presses on Halsey number

*Halsey POV*

I wait patiently for Lauren to call back, she didn't know why she was so excited for Lauren to call back she just was. She was excited to meet her and talk to her face to face, it was funny how I all ways talked about Lauren with friends and now she was going to actually meet her. A vibration on her leg snapped her out of her thoughts it was Lauren she breathed in and picked up the phone. *Ohh look who it is it's Ms. Jauregui, very shocked you picked up the phone* I could hear laughing on the other end and it made my heart beat a little faster. *Well I couldn't just let Halsey go with an unanswered question could I*  
I laughed I swear I haven't felt this happy in a long time. I could tell already that we are gonna grow to be close friends. *So what's the answer to my question ohh please don't make me wait anymore I'm just about to explode with excitement*  
*Yes I can feel the excitement from here, I'm taking my friends Dinah and Normani who also happen to be spying on my conversation with you* I laughed. *Thats cute are they fans* *ya but they more so just wanted to see who I was talking to* I wondered why Lauren didn't tell her friends she was talking to me. *why didn't you tell them it was me* I waited patiently for the answer for some reason I started getting nervous for no reason I knew that it couldn't be anything bad but my gut still had this strange feeling. *Because I wanted to keep you all to myself haha I also didn't know it was you calling* My heart was beginning to beat faster and my stomach was fluttering. I didn't know why I had these feeling for some reason maybe I just wanted to impress her or I don't know I can hardly even think right now *Hey are you there* I snap out of my thoughts and begin to nervously laugh. *ha well no need to be selfish there's enough of me to go around* I think back to myself what did I just say god how embarrassing. *oh really there's enough of you to go around* *Ya that didn't quite come out of my mouth correctly* We both laughed it felt we were childhood friends or something. *Hey I'm sorry it's getting really late and I have to wake up at 5am tomorrow but I can't wait to see you next week* I smile a little less and take a deep breath.*Yeah you should totally get some rest, can't wait to see you it's gonna be so much fun Goodnight Lauren*  
*Goodnight Halsey* I hang up and take a deep breath, then I lie down on my back and press my hand against my heart feeling it slow down. Man this girl is surreal.


	2. First Encounters

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rapid updates since this is old lol

*2015*

*Lauren POV*

Today's the day, I'm in my hotel at the moment looking through the possible outfits I could wear tonight. I mean it isn't really a big deal what I decide to wear to the concert but for some reason I've built it up to the point of extreme panic. I haven't spoken much to Halsey other than giving her the information needed to get us in the venue but this was gonna be the first time I meet her. I try to snap out of my thoughts and return to trying to pick and outfit. I've toned down the selections to a crop top and black skinny jeans with cuts in them or a black dress. I think for a minute and just stand there staring at the two outfits. Crop top and jeans it is I tell myself, I look at myself in the mirror, okay Lauren you look good I say in the mirror. I put on some red lipstick and do the rest of my makeup. When I'm ready I hear a knock at my hotel door. Its Normani and Dinah their wearing casual clothes that you'd see at a concert and suddenly I felt as if I put to much thought in my outfit.

Dinah: Ooo who are trying to impress  
Normani: Ya Lauren you look great  
Lauren: I'm not trying to impress anyone I just got dressed right now, now come on we have to head down. Are you guys ready  
Dinah: As ready as you, then no I might have to take another hour  
Lauren: Seriously come on let's go

We head down to the lobby and wait for our ride to the venue.

Normani: Omg can't believe we're going to a Halsey concert and are gonna meet her  
Dinah: Its gonna be so much fun right Lauren   
Lauren: Yep soo much fun with the both of you  
Normani: Lauren we're just teasing you, you have nothing to worry about we aren't gonna embarrass you in front of Halsey

*No POV*

Lauren somehow doesn't believe them and feels like tonight's gonna be a long night. They get to the venue and check in with security where they escort them to the back. Lauren forgets her phone in the car and goes back to get it, she can't believe she forgot her phone it's probably because she has so much on her mind. While Lauren is getting her phone Dinah and Normani run into Halsey.

Halsey: Hi I'm Halsey (she gives them both a hug but when looking around she doesn't see Lauren)  
Dinah: I'm Dinah its so nice to meet you I've been such a fan  
Halsey: Awe thank you I've been a fan of yours as well   
Normani: That's so amazing I'm Normani by the way such a pleasure to meet you  
(Halsey smiles at them both)  
Halsey: So where's Lauren?  
(Normani and Dinah both look at each other as if they forgot all about Lauren)  
Normani: She forgot something in the car and had to go back and get it, she should be back in a bit  
Dinah: So how do you know Lauren  
(For some reason got taken aback by the question and started getting nervous)  
Halsey: I actual don't really know her beside the stuff I see online but beside that we are practically strangers, but I like her as a person and think she's really cool so I invited her to this concert  
Dinah: Thats cool well I hope she lives up to your expectations  
(For some reason Halsey thinks she already has)  
Halseys manager: Hey Halsey the concerts about to start you should go get ready  
Halsey: Sure, guys I have to go but I'll be back and we can go hangout

They all exchange good byes and Halsey walks away from them a little upset that she hadn't gotten to see Lauren but she knew that she would definitely be watching her. This made her palms sweat and her anxiety kick in but she carried on in silence to prep room.

(Meanwhile back at the car)

*Lauren POV*

God where the hell is my phone. I search under the seats and in the between the seats. Wtf I whisper under my breath where the hell it my phone. Finally after like ten minutes of searching I finally find my phone it was in the seat pocket. How the hell did it get in there. I'm already annoyed and the night hasn't even begun I start walking back into the venue and find Dinah and Normani there talking.

Normani: Find everything you needed  
Lauren: yep (she holds out her phone so that the girls can see the precious object she's been searching for)  
Dinah: How did you forget your phone you always have it on you  
Lauren: I don't know guess I've been distracted lately   
Normani: Well to bad cause you just missed Halsey  
Lauren: What! She was here I can't believe I missed her  
Dinah: Well you probably shouldn't have taken so long (Lauren's annoyed by Dinah little comment)  
Security: Excuse me but we will like to escort you guys to you seats before people start flooding in  
Normani: Okay come on guys let's go

I sigh and linger behind Normani and Dinah on the way to our seats. I feel like I missed my chance to meet her but hey the nights not over yet. Our seats were on the second floor, so we had a pretty good view of the stage. I can't wait to see the show it's gonna be so much fun.

*Halsey POV*

I went in the prep room and got dress in something comfortable and light to wear. In the back of my head I keep saying to not screw this up. I felt like I was performing at the some music award show, I was so nervous. I guess I just wanted to impress Lauren not sure why but I guess you always want to impress new people you meet. Halsey's tour manager comes in the room and tells her that Lauren, Dinah and Normani will be sitting in the second row in the middle row. She tells me so that if I want to say hi during the show I can. I sighs, Okay let's go out and put on a good show! I step out of the room and head for the stage.

*No POV*

Halsey comes on the stage

Halsey: Hey everyone having a good time!

the crowd cheers and so does Lauren, Dinah and Normani.

Halsey: Are we ready to get this shit started!  
she starts to sing Hold me Down and all the girls dance with the music. The Artist continues to sing her songs and the girl are having the time of their life's. She then starts to sing Drive it's her final song she continues to sing   
~ All we do is Drive   
For some reason she looks up at Lauren she doesn't necessarily see her but she looks in that area and continues   
All we do is think about the feelings that we hide   
Halsey sees her for a split second but then sees her back away from the railing and it hurts her heart a bit. She doesn't know why. She barley even knows Lauren. She continues to sing this time moving to the other side of the stage  
All we do is sit in silence waiting for a sign

*Lauren POV*

Me and Dinah were dancing and jamming out so hard to every song, it's without a doubt we were gonna feel soar in the morning. It was the last song of the night Halsey was singing Drive, one of my favorites. I let the music coarse through my body and start to sway back and forth. I open my eyes during the Chorus.   
~All we do is Drive  
Halsey was looking this way, I wasn't sure if she was looking at me but it sure felt like it.  
All we do is think about the feelings that we hide  
I feel like I'm stuck in some sort of trance, I can't stop staring her way. I lean forward on the railing and take it all in. All the sudden I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket I see the caller ID and it's my mom and move away from the railing and move to a random hallway.

*Hey mom did u need something*  
*Mija where are you*   
I felt confused why would my mom wonder where I was *um I'm at that Halsey concert mom* I hear my mom sigh on the other side but it wasn't an annoyed sigh it sounded more hurt *Why mom what's happening* *Nothing Mija just have fun with your friends okay and make sure you stay safe okay*  
I was still confused but I feel like it was just my mom worrying about me. *Yes mom I will, Love you* *Love you too mija* I hang up and notice that the concerts over and there's already people filing out of the venue. I go to look for Dinah and Normani.

*Halsey POV*

I get off stage and go back stage to where the girls should be. I enter the room and I only see Dinah and Normani. Seriously again am I ever gonna see Lauren. Maybe she saw me looking towards her and got freaked out, God I fucking messed this all up. I say hi to Dinah and Normani and excuse myself to get something to drink. I move to the snack room I get a red solo cup and fill it up with coke and take a drink. Man today's been a stressful day I lean on the table to catch my breath and think about Lauren. Did she leave because of that incident I mean it was just an accident I didn't mean anything of it or did I. I shake the whole thing off and head towards the other girls. I walk down the hallway and turn the corner and crash into somebody, I end up spilling my drink all over them.

Person: Fuck seriously   
Halsey: Omg I'm so sorry I didn't

I look up to see it's Lauren that I crashed into. I got my coke all over Lauren. Seriously her luck today. She was in a white crop top and black jeans she looked hot, even with the huge brown stain on her crop top. I don't think Lauren has noticed it's me yet she still looking at her wet shirt and trying to clean up as much as possible.

Lauren: You gotta be fucking kidding me, fuck my life, On my white crop too  
Halsey: I'm so sorry

I say trying to help her dry herself off. She sighs and finally looks up at me. We stare for at each other for a second, her eyes in person were surreal and beautiful she then speaks up.

Lauren: I'm so sorry I didn't know it was you  
Halsey: Don't worry I was the one who spilled soda on you  
Lauren: Ha I guess this is how we meet huh  
Halsey: Yeah you know what do you mind if we start over

I turn around and then face back towards her

Halsey: Hi I'm Halsey

*No POV*

Halsey sticks out her hand for a hand shake. Lauren shakes her hand while laughing.

Lauren: Hi my name is Lauren and I'm drenched in Soda  
Halsey: Yeah seems like it's too late to turn back

Halsey grabs Lauren's hand, they perfectly fit, and drags her into the wardrobe room. Lauren was taken aback by the sudden motion. Halsey pulls her in and closes the door they were standing rather close. At the point where Lauren can feel Halsey breathing

Halsey: Sorry about the clothes

Lauren doesn't say anything, so there's a small moment of silence. Halsey moves away and Lauren finally takes a breath, was she holding it the whole time.

Halsey: You can pick something out here to wear, most is my style but you could pull it off

Lauren looks around at the clothes and picks and outfit its similar to the one she was wearing some pants, a black and white striped shirt and a Denim Jacket because it was getting chilly. Not realizing Halsey was still in the room she takes off her shirt. Now shirtless it finally pops in her mind that Halsey was there. Meanwhile Halsey was shocked that Lauren just took her shirt off it didn't show in her face though. Lauren turns to face Halsey and blushes

Lauren: So sorry totally forgot you were here   
Halsey: No it's fine (she gulps) we're both girls so it doesn't really matter

Lauren nods and faces back towards her clothes but she can't help but feel a cold shiver on her shirtless back that sends the hairs on her arms to raise. Halsey can't help but stare at Lauren's bare back, she was toned in all the right places. Lauren puts the shirt on and Halsey almost wishes she hadn't. Halsey tries to snap out of her thoughts, what was she thinking she didn't even know Lauren like that but she just writes her actions off as admiring Lauren. I mean there was no denying that Lauren was beautiful and hot so it's only nature to look. Lauren start to feel nervous and get butterfly's in her stomach. It feels like she had been getting changed for an hour now but it's only been a few minutes. Lauren starts to play with her belt buckle before having the courage to take off her pants. She slides them down slowly in way that made it seem very seductive but that wasn't what she intended to be doing, it just took longer to take her pants off because they were rather tight. In fact Lauren didn't even know what she was doing in her mind she was just taking off her pants. Halsey was sitting down "on her phone" but actually staring at Lauren taking off her pants, her heart started to race it felt like it was gonna jump out of her chest. Lauren was moving so slow she just barely got the pants to go over her butt and continued to move down at the same pace. Halsey can't help but bite her lip and be slightly turn on, she feels the urge to just go up to Lauren and pull down her pants herself and kiss her all over that toned body of hers. No no no Halsey shakes her head and looks back at her phone fighting the urge to look at the Cuban American.

Lauren: Fuck

Halsey looks at Lauren to see her struggling to get the last bit of her pants off. For some reason Halsey found the courage to go help her. She gets out of her seat.

Halsey: Sit down on this table  
Lauren: what?  
Halsey: Just do it I'm gonna help you

Lauren hops on the table and her breath is cut short when Halsey puts her hand in between her thighs and squeezes her thigh to get a better grip. It gave Lauren a weird sensation. Halsey herself was shocked by her motion but it was to late to turn back. If she wasn't already turned on before she definitely was now, the feeling of Lauren's thigh in her hand gave her a rush. Halsey takes her other hand and starts to pull Lauren pants down over her foot.

Lauren: Am I your strangest Fan experience

Lauren says to break the Silence

Halsey: hahaha well you sure are in the top 5

It cut the tension a bit. Halsey takes off the last pant leg and releases her grip. Her hand left a mark on Lauren thigh.

Halsey: Sorry about that it was really hard to get off   
Lauren: it's okay

Lauren smiles at Halsey and get off the table and puts on the jeans.

Lauren: Done nice and dry  
Halsey: Good don't want you to be uncomfortable the whole night.  
Lauren: Awe well thanks for thinking about me, we should go find Dinah and Normani  
Halsey: Yeah I'll lead you to them

They walk down the hallway and continue talking about random things. They hit it off rather quick if that wasn't already acknowledged.


	3. Bad News

*2015*

*No POV*

Lauren and Halsey walk back to the room Dinah and Normani are in. They enter the room laughing, giggling and playfully pushing each other.

Normani: Lauren where have you been! And what happened to your clothes

Lauren looks away from Halsey with a huge smile on her face.

Lauren: I had to take a phone call and on my way back here I bumped into Halsey, then she made me take all my clothes off

Normani and Dinah: What!!!

Lauren laughs hard and Halsey does as well but she can't help but blush a little.

Halseys: ha what can I say I have a way with the ladies

Lauren hits her and continues to laugh she didn't doubt what Halsey said. She definitely got Lauren flustered in the moment. Normani and Dinah just stand there confused.

Lauren: On my way here, Halsey thought it would be funny to dump soda on me  
Halsey: No she's kidding it was an accident but it was rather funny  
Lauren: She offered me some new clothes so that I didn't have to spend the night in wet ones  
Halsey: Yep and I told you, you could pull off my style of clothing, don't you guys think  
Dinah: Yeaaaa you look amazing

Dinah was still confused about what was happening but she probably shouldn't think much of it. Lauren gives a little giggle at Halsey's comment and looks down at the floor while flipping her hair in hopes it will cover up the fact that she's blushing.

Lauren: Well on that note maybe I'll invest in your clothing line

They all sit down on the couch in the small room. Lauren by Halsey and Normani and Dinah across from them.

Dinah: So was your expectations of Lauren peaked

Lauren raises her eyebrow wondering what Dinah was talking about. She looks at Halsey with a puzzled face.

Halsey: Well I definitely saw more of her than I expected  
Lauren: Stop! You don't have to keep reminding them  
Halsey: What I was just answering the question, but to truly answer your question Lauren definitely peaked my expectations

Halsey gives Lauren a little wink, and Lauren grins. Normani and Dinah start smiling at each other coming up with a plan to embarrass Lauren.

Normani: Well I do hope Lauren's expectations of you were peaked because man it's like she talks about 24/7

Lauren quickly looks at Normani with a deathly stare. Halsey was caught off guard and nearly choked on her spit

Lauren: What! No I don't, if anyone's talking about her 24/7 it's you and Dinah  
Dinah: Sureee I'm mean your were always like Omg Dinah We're gonna meet Halsey can't believe it I've had such a girl crush on her for the longest time ever, she's just so pretty

Lauren cut her off before she could say anything else.

Lauren: Are you kidding me I never said any of that. Um I mean your like totally pretty and stuff but   
Normani: But what, stop lying Lauren come on why did you dress up so sexy tonight

Normani said while nudging Dinah. Dinah sat there snickering. Lauren and Halseys faces were both red.

Lauren: What do you mean dress up I literally just put on some jeans and a crop top  
Dinah: You spent hours getting ready and made sure you put on the most revealing clothes to show off that bod of yours  
Normani: I mean I think she showed off enough right Halsey  
Halsey: umm well I   
Lauren: Don't answer them

Dinah winked at Lauren and smiled. Lauren knew exactly what she was trying to do and she wasn't gonna let it happen.

Lauren: Soo Dinah since we're talking body's why do I always catch you staring at Normani's

Dinahs shocked Lauren said that and doesn't speak for a second.

Dinah: What no don't change the subject   
Lauren: So your saying there's a subject to change to  
Dinah: No fine you have your way we will stop embarrassing you

It seems that's too late both Halsey and Normani are shocked and blushing.

Dinah: Okay! How bout we play a game what about Truth or Dare  
Normani:Yes  
Lauren:No  
Halsey: I don't mind

Lauren glares at Halsey, Halsey shyly smiles and shrugs her shoulders.

Dinah: Okay I'll start   
Normani: Truth or dare  
Dinah: I choose dare   
Normani: Okay I dare you to do a handstand   
Dinah: who the hell do you think I am  
Lauren: that not how you play the game, come on Dinah let's see what you got

Dinah sighed and proceeded to get up. Everyone was snickering at the Polynesian girl knowing she wasn't going to be able to do it. Dinah gets on her hands and knees and try's to do the handstand she uses her head to balance herself but it doesn't work she ends up falling back and crashing to the floor. The other girls burst with laughter.

Halsey: Are you okay

She says while trying to contain her laughter.

Lauren: ya u okay looks like you took quite the tumble  
Dinah: Be quite your turn  
Lauren: who said it was my turn  
Dinah: I did

Dinah got up from the floor and began to rub her head

Dinah: So Truth or Dare  
Lauren: Does it matter I'm gonna end up getting screwed over no matter what  
Dinah: Hurry up Lauren we don't have all day  
Lauren: Don't do anything bad please, I I choose Truth  
Dinah: Good choice (she said this with a diabolical smile she was obviously going to try and get revenge)  
Lauren: Fuck me get it over with already  
Dinah: Sooo Lauren if you weren't in a hurry to get back to us how long do you think you would have been in that room with Halsey

Dinah winks at Lauren. Lauren clenches her knee and begins to blush and Halsey can't help but do the same.

Lauren: What kind of question is that.  
Dinah: One that you need to answer so come on Lauren don't be shy you already gave her a preview  
Lauren: I swear you guys are making this more than it seems, I literally just met Halsey  
Dinah: That's not an answer, I mean it did take you a while to come back

Lauren face gets hot as she remembers the tension between her and Halsey during there little changing scene.

Halsey: Look guys really nothing happened, you guys sure do speculate a lot about Lauren's love life  
Normani: Ooh so there is a love life to speculate about, interesting  
Halsey: No no that's not what I meant   
Dinah: Man Normani I feel like we should leave and let them have their alone time  
Lauren: No nothing would have happened see unlike y'all I don't just sleep with someone  
Normani and Dinah: What's that supposed to mean  
Lauren: nothing, my answer is no I just changed my clothes no tension  
Halsey: Okay now that that's settled   
Normani Truth or Dare  
Normani: I choose Dare   
Halsey: Okay I dare you to stare into Dinahs eyes for a minute  
Normani: What what type of dare is that  
Lauren: no no nope that's not how this game works come on we don't have all day

Lauren smiles at Halsey and vice-versa.  
Normani sighs and looks towards Dinah she grabs the back of her neck and looks into Dinahs eyes.

Halsey: Don't look away or else your gonna have to start over  
Lauren: ooh I don't think they will have a problem looking away  
Halsey: Lauren is it just me or do you feel the tension between them  
Lauren: Ya I think we might have to leave soon cause I might not be able to breath anymore  
Halsey: I don't know if we can leave them alone I don't want the couch to get ruined  
Normani: Shut up

Lauren and Halsey continued to laugh. Normani had a few more seconds left. Over the few seconds Normani took every detail in Dinahs eyes in. She noticed every little speck in her eye. Dinah did the same it felt like forever but then the alarm went off. They both pulled away slowly and stayed in silence for a few seconds. Normani cleared her throats and spoke.

Normani: Okay Halsey pick your poison Truth or Dare  
Halsey: Dare  
Lauren: Nope what she meant was Truth  
Dinah: No she said Dare  
Halsey: It's tradition I always choose Dare first  
Normani: Okay I dare you to hmm let me see oh right. I dare you to stare into Lauren's eyes for a minute  
Dinah: Paybacks a Bitch  
Lauren: Ohh please you enjoyed it  
Normani: Well we hope it works out for you

Halsey shrugged her shoulders and grabbed Lauren's chin and faced it towards her.

Lauren: Start the timer already

They looked into each others eyes and the hair on the back of their necks stood up.

Normani: Dinah are you feeling what I'm feeling  
Dinah: Yep definitely I think they call it sexual tension

Lauren rolls her eyes time had to be over soon. Lauren moved her hand and it accidentally grazed Halsey's.

Lauren: Sorry  
Halsey: It's okay

They both felt each others he breath and it sent shivers through their body's. Lauren accidentally glances down at Halsey's lips. Countless scenarios ran through her head. What if? Halsey notices this and can't help but lick her lips. The other girls don't notice because their to busy joking around. Halsey looks back into Lauren's eyes she felt as if she was in a trance. She sighs and moves a little closer but it was very subtle but Lauren notices she bites down on her lip and closes her eyes. They both knew what they wanted to happen so they moved closer together.

(Vibrating)

Lauren pulls back quick when she feels her phone vibrate. Normani and Dinah look towards them

Dinah: Hey it wasn't a minute yet  
Lauren: My Moms calling, um I'm gonna go outside a take this

They girls nod at Lauren and Lauren walks out of the room. Halsey sighs and falls back on the couch pillow. Normani looks at Halsey with a smirk on her face.

Halsey: It was nothing but a dare  
Normani: I didn't say anything  
Halsey: mmmhhhmm  
Dinah: It okay we're just teasing Lauren, I doubt she likes you like that she tends to be very protective of her heart so not many people get in  
Normani: yep even today she won't tell me or talk to me about certain things  
Halsey: That's interesting I guess I girl just needs her space

Halsey was a little upset to hear how guarded Lauren was.

(Outside)

Lauren goes outside and picks up her phone. She sits down on a bench right outside of the venue, it was late so nobody was there.  
*Hey mom what's up* Lauren was confused why her mom was calling for the second time tonight. *Mija where are you right now* Lauren played with her hair and raised her eyebrows. *What do you mean I'm still at the Halsey concert, well not really I'm just hanging out backstage with her and Normani and Dinah Why do you need something* There was almost dead silence on the other end except for two people arguing in the background. *Hey mom is everything okay* She can hear her mom sniffling on the other end. Lauren was beginning to get worried. *Honey I really wanted you to just have a peaceful night.... and have fun... but this can't wait....* *Mom what is it.. is everything okay*  
(sniffles) *Honey your grandma passed away*

(Back in the room)

Halsey: Hey guys I'm gonna go outside and get some air

Dinah and Normani nodded and continued to talk

(Back outside)

Lauren drops the phone she doesn't see whether or not it cracked because she could really give no shits at the moment. She feels as if time stops.

Lauren: No no no no no thiisss can't be, no fuck no NO

Her hands are shaking and she begins to hyperventilate. She slumps down to the ground puts her hands in her hair and pulls as hard as she can. She can hear mumbling coming from her phone. She gets up and picks the phone up from the floor. It's cracked, she hangs up the phone and throws it full force to the ground, the phone shatters. She slips back into the same position.

Lauren: why... why is this happening to me please... please don't let it be true please this can't happen

She starts to hysterically cry and shake her head. Her nails were digging into the skin of her palms. Her head was buried into her knees and her back was pressed against the cold wall.

Halsey: Lauren omg are you okay

Halsey runs towards Lauren and falls to her knees to reach Lauren's level. Lauren doesn't respond and continues to cry and shake her head.

Halsey: Hey hey hey it's gonna be okay come on tell me what happened

Halsey grabs the back of Lauren's neck and lifted Lauren's chin up from her knees so that she was facing her. The girls eyes were rushing with water. She looked into Lauren's eyes and could see they were full of pain and sadness, Halsey wondered what could've caused this.

Halsey: Look everything gonna be okay, your gonna be okay

Halsey gets up off the floor and extends her hand towards Lauren. Lauren takes her hand and gets up she doesn't look at Halsey as if she doesn't want her to see her like this. Lauren doesn't cry infront of people and is often guarded.

Halsey: Hey look at me, tell me what happened

Silence no words came out of Lauren's mouth just sniffles and tears running down Lauren's face. Suddenly Lauren felt a warmth on her chest, Halsey was hugging her. Her body was still tense and she didn't reciprocate the hug.

Halsey: Come on Lauren let go, I'm here for you, I'm not gonna leave

With that Lauren holds onto Halsey tight and buries her face into the crook of her neck. She starts bawling and Halsey can feel the tears running down her neck and shoulder. The girl was over trying to keep up her image she just had to let it all out.

Halsey: Its okay, it's okay

They stay there for a few moments. Lauren was still crying but it wasn't as violent.

Lauren: My....grandma... she died  
Halsey: omg Lauren I'm so sorry  
Lauren: She was always so supportive of me and always kept me strong, she died...she's dead now  
Halsey: Lauren look she always going to be with you and your always going to have her words and wisdom with you

Lauren was still in the same position, while tears slowly fell down her cheeks.

Lauren: I'm nothing without her   
Halsey: No Lauren don't say that  
Lauren: No it's true I'm nothing she made me strong and now I'm nothing

Lauren pulls away from Halsey and starts running away. She was heading further away the venue. Halsey ran for her, after full sprinting for Lauren she finally caught up to her.

Lauren: Why are you following me  
Halsey: Cause your not in a good state a mind right now to be alone  
Lauren: what if I don't want you here  
Halsey: well too bad because I'm not leaving you

Lauren looked away from Halsey and towards the road. Halsey couldn't tell what the girl was thinking. She hoped the girl would be fine and have enough strength to get her through this. But Halsey couldn't help but worry she didn't. She looked down at Lauren's hands to see she was clenching them. Halsey put her hands over Lauren and opened them up. She saw the nail imprints on her palm along with blood. Halsey rubbed them with her thumbs and looked towards her but she wasn't looking, she was only looking at the palms of her hands.

Halsey: Lauren don't do this to yourself

Silence no word, no movements

Halsey: Lauren please don't hurt yourself, promise me

Still nothing, although Halsey barley knew Lauren she can feel so much pain in her heart. It felt as if her friend was slipping away. Halsey felt her own tears running down her face, she didn't notice she was crying.

Halsey: Lauren please please don't do it again

She choked on her words, she couldn't let another friend slip away from her. Suddenly she felt Lauren's hand on her cheek wiping away her tears.

Lauren: It okay I won't I promise, my grandma wouldn't want that

All the sudden they hear people running towards them it was Normani and Dinah. Halsey quickly wiped away her tears and caught Lauren in a embrace.

Halsey: Your gonna be okay, I'm here whenever you need me  
Lauren: Take you Halsey   
Halsey: Call me Ashley

Lauren's heartbeat decreased and her tears were no longer frequent.

Lauren: Thank you Ashley, really thank you  
Dinah: Lauren are you okay your mom called worried  
Normani: Babe what's wrong

Lauren looked towards them with a sad look on her face and began to speak in a hoarse voice.

Lauren: I think it time for us to go Ashley, I'll call you later

Halsey nods and says bye to the girls and gives Lauren one last hug. Lauren walks away with Dinah and Normani with her head hanging low. They call their driver to pick them up. Lauren doesn't speak to either girl and stays quiet the whole trip back to the hotel.

Normani: Lauren seriously what's wrong  
Dinah: ya it okay Lauren you can talk to us

They finally reach the hotel and in the elevator to head towards their rooms. Lauren still didn't speak nor look at the other girls. They walked Lauren to her room.

Normani: Lauren you don't have to be alone, I know something happened and I don't want you to be alone  
Dinah: please we can't help you if you don't tell us anything

It felt like Lauren had put her guard back up. She didn't want her pain and sadness to be a burden on the other girls.

Lauren: Your guys I'm fine really go get some sleep  
Normani: Lauren don't lie to us  
Lauren: Normani seriously I'm fine! Im just tired, I'm fine really just go

Normani grabbed Lauren's shoulder and gave it a squeeze she could tell Lauren didn't want to talk about it. Dinah then gave her a hug and whispered in her ears that everything is going to be okay. Lauren didn't believe that. The girls walked back to their rooms and Lauren moved toward her bedroom. She goes to the bathroom and wraps her hands in gauze. She then moves towards her bed and lays down on her bed. She puts her hands on her face and softly cries. She knew this pain wasn't going to go away soon and that she was going to be struggling with this everyday.


	4. The Long Fall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi :p how y'all doing? lol Enjoying?

*2015*

*Lauren POV*

I wake with dry tears and crusty makeup still caked on my face. It was 7 am, I could barely sleep last night but still managed to wake up early. I get off my bed and feel nothing. No sadness, no despair, no happiness. I feel nothing. A knock at my door interrupted my thoughts. I ignore it and head to the bathroom to wash my face. The knocking continued but I really didn't care. I then heard my door click open and my manager and the other girls flood through they were all dressed up.

Manager: Lauren where have you been  
Lauren: Here obviously   
Manager: Quit your shit Lauren we have an interview to head to and you were supposed to be at makeup

I really couldn't have cared less about this stupid interview but whatever she had to roll with the punches.

Lauren: I don't know guess I forgot  
Manager: Lauren you never forget these things are you okay

The girls look at me worried and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. I hated being treated like this like some sort of victim, like a lost puppy. I wasn't any of those things, man people just need to leave me alone.

Lauren: Look I forgot okay deal with it now if we are supposed to have an interview I should be getting ready now, so all of you could stay here and speculate about me but I'm done and ready to start the day okay.

I walk out the room not waiting for a response from our manager or the girls. I wasn't gonna stand there anymore to be looked at like that, or to be questioned. I am fine I don't need anyone's consultation to know that. I go to the make up room and sit down to get ready, this makeup session was going to take longer because of my baggy and puffy red eyes but I didn't care.

(Back in Lauren's Room)

*No POV*

Everyone looked astonished that Lauren spoke back like that.

Manager: What was that about

The girls had no idea at least Ally and Camila didn't but both Normani and Dinah looked away shyly. They didn't want to get management involved in the situation but it was too late.

Manager: Dinah, Normani speak you obviously know something

They look towards each other as if they were speaking telepathically. They both finally nod at each other and face the management.

Dinah: Look this is new and we don't know what it's about  
Normani: It started yesterday something happened when we were out with Halsey  
Dinah: Look maybe it's just not been her week, maybe even that time of the month  
Normani: You should call Halsey and see if she knows anything, I doubt it because a closed off person but you never know  
Dinah: Don't do anything stupid, she might just need some alone time or something  
Manager: Okay, but keep her in check we don't need her to go ape shit crazy okay

Their manager walks out of the room leaving the girls alone together. Normani and Dinah sit down on the couch and let out a deep sigh. Ally and Camila were still just confused and concerned about the whole situation.

Camila: Wait what's happening is Lauren okay  
Normani: I don't know she doesn't act like this, guys I'm scared for her  
Dinah: Look it's gonna be okay, we just need to be there for her and make sure management doesn't take over on this  
Ally: Okay Let's do this, let's do this for Lauren

The girls all pull themselves into a group hug and head out of the room. They move towards the makeup room to check on Lauren. She wasn't there.

*Lauren POV*

I got tired of the sorry faces so I decided to take a break from it all. The interview wasn't till an hour or so. I decided to start heading out of the building when I run into my manager, I roll my eyes I didn't want to start talking to her so I just pushed through. Unfortunately I didn't get far because she grabbed my arm and tugged me so that I was closer to her.

Manager: Look I know your in a bad mood and whatever but it's not the time to be acting rational. Keep it to yourself. We clear  
Lauren: Fuck off, I don't give a shit anymore, do what you want with me I don't care  
Manager: Stop I don't want to do anything to you Lauren, but this is a business and you need to be professional   
Lauren: Sorry I'm trying to be a person before a business, look I'm heading out taking a breather or whatever, and I promise you ma'am I'm going to be the best business associate ever okay are we clear  
Manager: Just clear your attitude okay we don't need any of that vein associated with fifth harmony  
Lauren: yes ma'am I'll clean my attitude lickity-split   
Manager: I'm serious, now where are you going  
Lauren: Why concerned, because that doesn't really suit you .....I'm going to get a new phone happy  
Manager: What happened to you old one  
Lauren: Got completely destroyed okay  
Manager: Seriously Lauren, whatever go and don't come back acting like this

I walk away and say under my breath

Lauren: Maybe I shouldn't come back at all

(At the Phone Store)

I walk into to the phone store and check out the different iPhones. I might as well upgrade while I'm here. Whispers and gasps caught my attention and I turned towards the other side of the store. There was a family that had noticed me, Although I wasn't in the mood for interactions I gave them a wave to come towards me. The little girls rushed towards me and hugged me tightly. It provided me with a second to escape, but of course it doesn't last long and I feel pain start to swarm back.

Lauren: Fans huh

The girls don't say a word and just nod

Dad: Yes there huge fans of yours   
Lauren: Great, you guys want to take a picture or something

The girls looked pleased with my suggestion and stood by me ready to pose.

Mom: Okay girls get ready for the camera  
Dad: one, two, three Cheese

The flash goes off and temporarily blinds me but I quickly shake it off. I sign some of the girls things and wish them luck. I return to picking out my phone, I don't give it much thought and just get the newest iPhone. The interviews in a little more than 30 min so I decide to start heading back. On my way to my car I get stopped by a crowd of teenagers.

Crowd: Lauren, Lauren come take pics with us

I felt like I was ambushed and surrounded from all around. I felt my anxiety kick in and felt as if I was having a panic attack. I didn't have security because nobody takes us seriously. I was all alone.

Lauren: Guys I really have to go, I have an interview to do  
Crowd: Come on Lauren take a picture with us  
Lauren: Find we will do a group picture

*No POV*

Lauren goes into the crowd people were pushing and shoving to get closer to Lauren, trying to at least touch her. She felt uncomfortable but put on a fake smile for the camera. After the picture the crowd left and Lauren got in her car. She sat there with her hands on the steering wheel for a few min. She had to wait for her panic attack to settle. Good thing it wasn't an extreme one, she heads on the road towards the hotel where the interview was taking place.

(Hotel)

Manager: Where the hell is Lauren  
Dinah: I don't know maybe she ran into some trouble  
Manager: Why do you always have to make excuses for her, she just being dumb today  
Normani: look she not even that late it's only been five min  
Manager: It doesn't matter she needs to be responsible for her actions

Lauren walks in she knows she's late and has already prepared herself to be yelled at.

Manager: Lauren where the fuck have you been, your late  
Lauren: I know I ran into some trouble and got held back  
Manager: Sure you did, whatever go everyone get inside

They all go in the room and introduce each other to the interviewer. The interviewer was a middle age man who seemed rude and not interested in them at all. Lauren was glad that she was going to spend five minute less with him. He seemed to have a bad vibe about him. They girls all sit down on a couch and get ready for the first question.

Interviewer: So I'm here with the girl group of your generation Fifth Harmony. Now we love music and such but we have to get to the most important question, Fifth harmony who are your celebrity crushes  
Ally: Wow really going straight for it huh  
Interviewer: Yeah well everyone wants to know, pretty ladies like yourself need a man in your life  
Lauren: Well I personally don't feel like I need a man right now, and frankly don't have many male celebrity crushes  
Camila: umm yea same not really thinking about boys to often  
Dinah: Yeah we've been more focused on making new music  
Interviewer: Well that's a shame, well you heard it here folks a man hasn't swooped fifth harmony off their feet

The girls faked laughed at his comment and awkwardly continued the interview.

Interviewer: So one last juicy question since you guys are always on the road does your relationship with family gets strained  
Lauren: I think it definitely does and that sucks but every once and a while we get back in touch and catch up  
Interviewer: So Lauren do you believe business should come before family  
Lauren: No I think there should be a good balance, sometimes family interferes with business and that can be a bad thing so yea I definitely think there should be balance  
Interviewer: You ever have a grandma or something bugging you about your job

Lauren's heart stops for a moment and she doesn't speak. It goes on long enough for the girls to notice something was wrong.

Lauren: .....uh...no my grandmas great, amazing actual and she...supports everything I do  
Interviewer: I mean she has to bug you sometimes though, grandmas sometimes never know when to stop talking

Lauren took this as an attack on her grandmother and started to clench her fist. He had no right to speculate about her grandma or intrude on her life.

Lauren: Leave it alone! My grandma isn't like that  
Interviewer: Whoa what a temper on that one probably gets it from her grandma right hahahah  
Lauren: Go fuck yourself

Lauren gets up and runs out of the room. She runs past everyone and has tears in her eyes. It was possible for her to not feel anything her idol, her best friend, her rock, her grandma died. She felt the tears running down her cheek at a faster rate.

Security: No running!

She kept running, she made sure she ran where no one would find her for a while.

(In the room)

The room was dead silent and the girls were just looking at each other in shock. Their manager looked just as shocked but also angry.

Interviewer: Sensitive huh  
Dinah: Dude Shut up

With that the girls got off the couch and headed out to look for Lauren. The manager called the interviewer company and told them they were not allowed to air the interview. Meanwhile, the girls go back towards Lauren's room hoping she's in there. Normani knocks on the door.

Normani: Lauren are you in there, we just want to know if you're okay  
Ally: Lauren everything's okay can you just open the door

Their manager walks in between the girls and slides a key card in and opens the door.

Manager: Lauren where the hell are you

No reply only silence.

Camila: Lauren you there?

Still nothing but a faint noise coming from Lauren's room. They open the door thinking they'd find Lauren but instead find her new phone. They look at it to see 27 missed calls from Lauren's mom.

Dinah: Whoa whys Lauren's mom calling so much

Lauren's mom calls again and Ally picks up. *Omg Lauren finally honey are you okay* Lauren's mom's voice was hoarse *Sorry but this isn't Lauren* *Ohh Ally have you seen Lauren can you pass her the phone* Ally put the phone on speaker so that the others could hear. *No actually Lauren's sort of missing at the moment* *Has she been okay ever since* Ally and everyone else grew confused *What do you mean ever since* Lauren's mom went silent. *She didn't tell you guys...* Everyone was confused on what she was saying *Umm well Lauren's Grandma just passed away* The girls were both shocked and sad, they couldn't believe Lauren's grandmother had passed away. This was why Lauren has been acting strange. *Omg I'm so sorry Clara, she was an amazing person*  
*Thank you Ally, has Lauren been okay* Ally sighs *She's definitely been in a lot of pain, you know how Lauren is with emotions...it's gonna take her awhile* *Please tell her to call me, and please look after her I'm afraid something bad might happen to her* *Its okay owe will don't worry* Ally talks with Lauren's mom for a bit and ends the call. The girls sit on Lauren's bed in unbelievable shock. Ally was holding back some tears.

Ally: We should go find Lauren

Nobody said anything and just nodded and left the room. They split up Ally and Camilla went off in one direction while Dinah and Normani the other. They look all over the building but still don't find Lauren. They have been searching for over half an hour already and still no sign. They all started to worry about her and thought that something could have happened to her.

Ally: Have you guys found her yet  
Normani: No we haven't  
Camila: Do you guys know where she might be  
Dinah: I don't know maybe we should check again

They decided to split up again but this time all four of them went there separate ways. Ally looked around back, Camila in the lobby, Dinah in the front. Normani had a feeling that looking around was gonna be a waste of time, so she decided to ask the security if they have seen her.

Normani: Excuse me ma'am have you see a girl come around here, she has black hair, may have come running by.  
Security: You know actually I have, she seemed very upset, she ran towards the stairs  
Normani: Thank you

Normani headed towards the stairs she headed up them until she reached the end. She found herself standing in front of the door leading to the roof.

Normani: Please don't be up here

Normani pushes open the door to see Lauren sitting on the edge.

Normani: Lauren get back!


	5. Control

*2015*

*Lauren POV*

I hear Normani yell something but I couldn't quite catch what she said. So I didn't reply and continued to look at the busy street hoping it would clear my head. There was still a wetness to my face from all my crying. My eyes were for sure red and puffy but it didn't bother me. Out of nowhere I felt hands on me and with one swift movement the hands tugged me back with such force that I ended up falling hard on the gravel that was on the roof.

Lauren: Oww Fuck man Fuck that really hurts, what's wrong with you dude  
Normani: I...thought...you were gonna jump

She was out of breath as if she had   
Sprinted up all the stairs and towards me.

*No POV*

Lauren: What? Why would I jump  
Normani: Cause your grandma died and I thought  
Lauren: How..um how do you know that  
Normani: Your mom told us she's worried about you Lauren, Lauren it's okay you can talk to me

Lauren was about to say something but she found herself choked up.

Normani: Lauren it okay, come you can talk to me

Normani move her hand to comfort Lauren but she flinches and moves away from Normani.

Lauren: Im fine  
Normani: Stop saying that, your obviously not fine   
Lauren: I am fine, Okay! I just came here to get air  
Normani: Lauren talk to me please I can see your hurting, it's just us  
Lauren: I don't want to talk about it! Leave me alone!

Lauren moves toward the door exiting the roof. But before she's able to pull the door open she feels Normani's hand on hers.

Normani: You can't avoid the pain Lauren, the more you ignore it the stronger it's gonna hit you

Lauren hears what Normani says but chooses to ignore her advice. She opens the door and heads down the steps and towards her room. On the way to her room she braced herself for the looks she was going to be given, everyone had probably known about her grandma. She hated this feeling, she hated looking like a victim like some pathetic sob. There's few more minutes of walking before she finds herself in front of her door . Her hand's hovering over the door knob.

Normani: Its okay everyone wants to support you  
Lauren: No need like I told you, I'm fine

Lauren sighs and closes both eyes so she doesn't see the girls faces. She turns the knob and pushes the door open.

(Few minutes earlier in Lauren's room)

Ally was the first to return to the room, she didn't find Lauren and was starting to get really worried. She sat on the living room couch slouching with her hands holding her head.

Ally: Please God let her be okay

The hotel door opened and Ally immediately got up. It wasn't Lauren but Dinah and Camila.

Ally: Did you guys find her  
Dinah: No no luck  
Camila: Yea I searched everywhere I couldn't find her, do you think she left  
Ally: No her Car was still in the back, did you guys hear from Normani yet

Both girls said no and sat on the couch. Ally grew even more nervous hopefully Normani had found Lauren. Only five minutes passed but it felt like hours, there still was no Normani or Lauren. The girls were in the living room sitting silently, with the occasional tapping on the wood floors because of a antsy Dinah. The door then opens.

*Lauren POV*

When opening my eyes I immediately see the girls sitting on my couch with worried faces. Ally jumps up off the couch and comes towards me and hugs me tight. I hesitantly hug her back.

Ally: You you worried me

She said while holding back her emotions.

Lauren: I was just getting some sir

The other girls gather around me for a group hug. Although I was trying hard to hide my feelings I couldn't help but let some tears slide down my face.

Lauren: I'm...okay guys...really I'm okay

Ally grabs my face, we both face each other. I saw Ally's eyes start to fill with water. She leans into me and whispers in my ear

Ally: I know your hurt...and it's okay to be...you have your walls up Lauren, but it's time to take them down....please Lauren let's me help you

I squeezed my eyes shut not wanting to see Ally or anyone else. More tears started to gentle fall from my eyes, and glided down my cheeks. With the room filled with silence you could hear the water droplets lightly hit the floor. I didn't want to show anyone what I was feeling. I didn't want to let anyone in, I couldn't let myself free, and trust someone with my heart again. Not after people so often took advantage of my heart and chipped away at it slowly. This was the only way I could keep the rest of my heart safe. If I let go of myself I would get hurt, I would have to face my fears, feel this pain, I don't want to. I want to have a normal life, I want to be happy for once, I want to

Ally: Lauren your Grandma died

It hit me like a brick, just someone saying those words out loud made me want to throw up. A part of me was still in denial but the words hurt to much to do nothing. I couldn't ignore it any longer the pain, sadness, despair it hit me all at once. My tears started to run down my face faster, I start to shake my head, no no I don't want to believe it. The Hands rubbing my shoulder and back brought me back to reality. In the matter of seconds I started to break down, I bury my head into the crook of Allys neck. I hysterically cry not saying a word, nor caring that the girls are seeing such a vulnerable side of me.

*No POV*

They stay in the same position for 10 min, Lauren still crying although less violent. The girls surrounded her gentle rubbing her back and squeezing her shoulder. Their interrupted by a door click and opening. To the girls surprise on the other side was their manager and 2 CEOs. Ally taps Lauren on the shoulder signaling that someone was there. Lauren lifts her head, despite having waterproof mascara some of it was messed up. She wipes away her tears and cleans up her face a bit. She then turns back to face the visitors. They show no sympathy on their face, only a slight look from their manager that seemed apologetic. Lauren knew this intrusion was purely business.

CEO 1: Sorry to break up girl talk but we must speak with Lauren  
Ally: Look this isn't a good time can't you come later  
CEO 2: No we can't you've already intruded on our schedule so we must do this now  
Lauren: what's this about  
CEO 1: Well we heard from multiple sources that you've been actin up

Their manager looks away from Lauren not wanting her to look at Lauren's face.

CEO 1: Lauren let's discuss things in the other room

Lauren shyly walks with the older gentlemen and the manager

Manager: I'm a dick I know but I didn't say anything

They move outside to the hallway, this was a relief to Lauren because it meant the conversation was going to be short.

Lauren: So what do we need to discuss  
CEO 2: Given situations we are in because of you, we must put some restrains on you  
Lauren: What do you mean situation I put you in  
CEO 1: Your actions in that interview, it was live Lauren, social medias blowing up about it  
CEO 2: This childish behavior could impact Fifth Harmony, and the groups development

Lauren was about to say something but decided against it. It'll only be used against her.

CEO 1: With people now having a negative opinion of you we want to book as many interview as possible to raise people's opinions   
Lauren: Its not such a great time for me   
CEO 1: Whatever's going on can wait, Fifth Harmony is the priority  
Lauren: No really I...I have to take a break from all this, someone very important to me has.....passed away  
CEO 2: Lauren grow up people pass away all the time, doesn't matter   
Lauren: Your so heartless

Lauren forms a fist behind her back and squeezes tightly. She couldn't believe what she was hearing.

CEO 1: Its business Lauren, and there's another change to your life we will be making. We have decided you'd be "dating" that boy from vamps his names Brad hopefully this will get girls to like you  
Lauren: Hell No I'm not letting you be in charge of my life  
CEO 1: I'm afraid you have to Its apart the of your contract

Lauren was speachless she felt as if her whole life was being taken away from her. She no longer had control, everything was going to shit.

CEO 2: Now that you understand what will be happening, we will be on our way to another meeting  
CEO 1: Lauren no more acting up or consequences will be more severe, and get over it, it's not who ever died was the most important person in the world

The CEO's turn around to head down the hallway. Lauren moves the fist behind her back and steps forward with the intention to beat the living shit out of them, but her manager catches her fist and looks at her with a look that says it's not worth it. Lauren puts her hand down and crosses her arms.

Manager: So about what happened, you doing okay

Lauren looks at her with a deathly glare, her eyes seemed dead inside and defeated. At this moment she'd given up.

Lauren: Its not like you care actually. In fact Nothing happened, it's not like anyone important died right   
Manager: Look don't believe them it does matter  
Lauren: No it doesn't! Nothing fucking matters anymore! I have no fucking control of my life, and it doesn't fucking matter right. I don't fucking matter, I'm just some bullshit surrogate for everyone else's plans!

Lauren was yelling at the top of her lungs. This made the girls open the door and see what was going on. Others in the hotel began to open their doors as well looking for the cause of all the ruckus.

Manager: Look keep it down, I don't want you getting in trouble.   
Lauren: Trouble huh. Do what ever the fuck you what with me, I already have no control.  
Normani: Lauren calm down what happened

Normani reaches for Lauren's arm but Lauren violently tears it away.

Lauren: Leave me alone, everyone just leave me alone! You all pretend like you care but you don't you just use me for your own personal gain.   
Dinah: What are you talking about we're your friends  
Lauren: Friend ha I don't have any anymore. They all left when I entered this music career, I'm nothing more than a puppet now. I'm done feeling for others

Lauren calmed down, no other girl said anything. Lauren looked down and repeated in her head I'm nothing more than a puppet and Stop caring stop the pain. Lauren walks away from the girls and goes down the hallway. Ally goes to get her but their manager stops her.

Manager: She needs time to think, she's going through a lot right now and she needs the space to decide what she wants to do  
Ally: What happened   
Manager: Those assholes are taking control of Lauren's life. Right now we have to support her because I honestly don't think Lauren knows how bad shits about to get. I know I've been making your life's shit and I've been hard on you guys but it was so that this didn't happen.

They all go back in Lauren's room and their manager explains what going to be happening. The manager decide to reschedule the interview in the next morning.

(At Halsey's venue)

*Halsey's POV*

My day was filled with interviews and press. It all exhausted me to the point of actually passing out in my makeup chair. With so much going on I still find myself going back to thinking about Lauren. Last night was sure as hell a rollercoaster it was filled with excitement, anxiety, joy and ended in sadness. That seemed to be how all my days were built now minus the joy. I sure hope Lauren's doing good, something like that just being sprung on you is sure to hurt. I think about texting Lauren to see how's she's doing but I don't, I barely know her and maybe I'll be intruding on something. I put my phone down and move to get changed.

Lido: Hey babe....Helllloo you their

He comes up to me a smushes my face into a kiss, his lips tasted like alcohol. I lightly push him away so I can finish changing. The bitter taste was still in my lips.

Lido: You should really show your boyfriend some more loving  
Halsey: Ohh really well maybe you should be here more often and not out partying with random girls  
Lido: Whatever you gotta live a little  
Halsey: I think drinking and partying everyday is gonna make you live a little less  
Lido: Babe its the rockstar life style I didn't choose it, it choose me  
Halsey: Yea keep telling yourself that

He lays on the couch scrolling through his phone. I honestly sometimes wonder why I'm still with him, but I remember under all the alcohol and partying they were each other's constant. I've so often been dumped to the side by people and Lido was one of the last people I had, not the best person but there's a love there. I finish getting dressed and give him a peck on the lips.

Halsey: Gotta go do the soundcheck, you have any plans for tonight  
Lido: Me and a few buddies are going out to the club, wanna come  
Halsey: I don't know

Lido grabs my wrists

Lido: Come on babe you've been working all day and it seems like you have to get your mind off something sooo come with me  
Halsey: Fine I'll go but no pressuring me to drink  
Lido: Pinky promise

(After Concert) 8:15 pm

I go back stage to changing room to put on some clothes for the club. I put together a simple outfit some pants, a shirt and a sweatshirt because it was cold out. My boyfriend was passed out on the couch the alcohol probably caught up with him. I take off my shirt and put on the one I picked and my sweatshirt. I move to take off my pants I pull them down hallways before taken a break. Shit why did I put on these tight ass pants. After ten minutes of trying forcing them down I finally got to my ankles. While trying to take them off I slip and fall down. Fuck why do I have such shit balance. The fall woke up my boyfriend.

Lido: why are u on the floor with no pants, trying to get my attention huh  
Halsey: No idiot I can't get my pants off  
Lido: Well I'll help you take those right off  
Halsey: Shut up and help me

*No POV*

Lido gets off the couch and helps Halsey up. Halsey sits down on a chair while her boyfriend ties taking off her pants. Well this sure is some Deja vu shit. Halsey remembers taking off Lauren's pants and how nervous and jittery she felt while doing it.

God what I'm I thinking, I can't be thinking about Lauren not like that. I don't even know the girl.

Lido: You can get dressed now  
Halsey: huh what ohh yea thanks  
Lido: Sure are spacing out a lot, penny for your thoughts  
Halsey: I always thought penny's were pretty useless

She walks away and puts on her pants.

Halsey: Are we going  
Lido: Yep let's go party

(At the Club)

Halsey looks out of the window to see the brightly lit club. She got out of the tacky limo her boyfriend called, she hated those sorts of things. Her boyfriend was just trying to get people's attention. To her surprise the bouncer didn't even question their age and just let them in. Lido put his arm around Halsey and guided her in, but once seeing his friends he quickly abandoned her and left to catch up. She sighs as if she knew any better and heads over to the bar.

Bartender: What will it be  
Halsey: Well I have to make this night bearable but I also don't want to get too drunk  
Bartender: You a lightweight   
Halsey: I can take the liquor   
Bartender: I'll start you off with a shot  
Halsey: Too a shitty night

(A few more shots later)

Well I'm pretty drunk right now so I guess I failed goal one.

Halsey had a total of six shots the alcohol hit her in stages. First being the wow that didn't do anything. Second okay getting a little more tipsy and Third I feel fucking amazing. She was definitely on the feeling fucking amazing stage but she still had control almost everything. She goes to the bar to get another drink this time changing it up. She goes back towards her boyfriend when suddenly some idiot trying to dance accidentally pushes her into someone making her spill her drink all over them.

Halsey: Omg I'm sorry   
Person: Man this happens to me way to often

They look at each other and smile

Lauren: Haha really we have to stop meeting like this I don't think me clothes can handle it  
Halsey: Ha Sorry about it umm mind coming with me again  
Lauren: Sure how can I say no

They both move to the bathroom.

Halsey: I'm really sorry about your shirt but at least you still look good

She isn't sure what she's saying, the alcohol starting to get to her

Lauren: So I look good huh   
Halsey: Well you always look good so don't act surprised

It probably wasn't a good idea they were both together and intoxicated.

Lauren: Really huh well I can say the same for you and I haven't even seen that much of you

Halseys face began to get red as she revisited their last encounter and how Lauren's body looked.

Halsey: Well that's a shame but I'm always the one to get you wet  
Lauren: That seems to be our thing  
Halsey: Hear you can have my sweatshirt  
Lauren: Soon I'm gonna have a closet full of your clothes  
Halsey: Don't worry about it I've probably ruined a closet worth of your clothes, I've been meaning to ask how are you

Shit why did she ask that it was sure to ruin the mood.

Lauren: I've been fucking great, absolutely fuckin great, this alcohol sure is doing its job to make that happen  
Halsey: I know we just met but you can talk to me if you need anything  
Lauren: I'm done talking about my shitty my life is. I'm just gonna have the time of my life

Lauren takes Halsey's hand and rushes her to the bar.

Lauren: Two shots please  
Bartender: Here you go two shots for the lovely couple  
Halsey: Ohh we're not a couple I have a boyfriend

Lauren was a bit disappointed.

Lauren: Come on cheers to a new friendship

They clinked their glasses and downed the shot. Before Halsey could say anything else her boyfriend came up to her obviously drunk as hell and kissed her aggressively. She kisses back just to get it over with. Lauren stands there awkwardly waving at the bartender to bring her another drink. Finally they break up the kiss.

Lido: Whoo the hell are you  
Halsey: um she's a friend of mine  
Lauren: Hi I'm Lauren, Nice to meet you  
Lido: Why the fuck is she wearing you shirt  
Halsey: I accidentally spilled my drink on her, so I let her use my sweatshirt

Lauren just stood to the side awkwardly watching the couple.

Lido: Babe on come with me let's Dance  
Halsey: I hate dancing  
Lido: Come on let's go

Lido drags Halsey away to the dance floor leaving Lauren by herself.

Lauren: Man my life's really is shit

She orders two more shots up and calls up some "friends" to keep her company.

(Two hours later, Still at Club)

*Halsey POV*

I'm finally able to sneak away from my boyfriend. I don't understand why he was being so protective of me. He left me as soon as we got in the club. I walk over to the bar.

Bartender: Really nice boyfriend you got there  
Halsey: He has moments but he really does care, why do you even care  
Bartender: Just making conversation, but if I were you I would have taken my chances with the girl

I pick up a water and move back towards my boyfriend. I think about all my past relationships. Looking back she really is bad at love. Every relationship ended badly and her and lido often broke up, fought and got back together. I feel like the only reason why I stick with Lido is because I'm just tired of being alone, I can't remember the amount of times I found him with another girl and just forgave him. I guess I couldn't help it anymore I was just to lonely to let anyone else slip away. Fuck this alcohol sure is having a different effect on me then usually. On my way to Lido I see Lauren sitting alone downing drinks. She waves at me to come over so I do.

Lauren: Heeeyyyyy you still here  
Halsey: Yea I've just been hanging out  
Lauren: Coool coool cooool wanna drink  
Halsey: No thanks I stopped drinking I while ago, I can sort of feel myself sobering up  
Lauren: Ohh welll more for me I guess

Lauren goes to take another drink but I quickly take it away from her.

Halsey: You really shouldn't be drinking that much Lauren  
Lauren: Don't ruin all the funnnnn come on relax a little  
Halsey: I think you've had a little to much to drink Lauren, where's your friends  
Lauren: Friends I don't know what those are but these so called friends you speak of were over th..... Oh looks like they left me here whoops oh well who cares more booze for me  
Halsey: No, no more alcohol, don't you have things to do  
Lauren: Fuck if I know haha What's my manager gonna do yell at me, hahaha my life's already a piece of shit  
Halsey: How your apart of a great girl group with your friends  
Lauren: Stop saying friends, we're all just apart of the business, we sing and live a manufactured life that all it is  
Halsey: Hey are you okay  
Lauren: Why the fuck do you care, your probably just here to use me

Lauren gets up out of her seats and begins to wobble to the club doors.

Halsey: Lauren wait up  
Lauren: Leave me the Fuck alone okay

She goes outside and leans on the club wall. Despite Lauren telling me to go away I go after her. If anyone person would have told me that I would have let them go but I was genuinely worried about Lauren. She seemed so different then the person she met earlier in the night.

Halsey: Lauren Give me your phone  
Lauren: What no and didn't I tell you to leave me alone

Lauren's phone was in her hand so I decided to quickly take it away from her.

Lauren: Hey give that back  
Halsey: No I'm calling someone to pick you up  
Lauren: God why are you always in my business  
Halsey: I'm trying to help you Lauren, your gonna end up getting yourself hurt

I open her phone and look through her contacts I see Normani's name and press it. She picks up quickly. *Lauren are you okay* * Umm hi this is actually Halsey, Lauren's here with me drunk at a club* *What she was supposed to be at an art museum* *Well she's not so umm if you could pick her up that would be great I don't want to see her getting hurt* Lauren rolls her eyes at me *Thanks for calling me I'll be there in ten* I text her the address and give Lauren back her phone.

Lauren: I can't have any fuckin fun today  
Halsey: Lauren what's up with you, did something happen

The question hit Lauren stronger than it should have. She thought what didn't happen today. She looked away with sad eyes.

(Earlier in the night)

*Lauren POV*

I sit down in a corner booth waiting for my "friends" arrive. Twenty minutes later they come and find me, they were dressed trashy like they were looking for every guys attention. I always hated that type of shit. They come up to me a say hi. Not engaging in any further conversation with me. Throughout the night they only took pictures with me and commented how their followers had gone up. Half way through the night they left me to go see what some boys on the other side of the room were doing. This was a shitty night I just wanted to have fun, let loose for one more night. I get a call later in the night it was my manager as much as I didn't want to answer I didn't want to cause more problems between us. *Lauren where are you*. I sigh I just want to be left alone. *Look I'm fine and no harsh feeling this is all business and I get it*. Those words left a bitter taste in my mouth, truth be told I hated how the industry was built constantly silencing woman and sexualizing them it was pathetic. *Okay but I need to know where you are and I'm gonna need you to come in later tonight so that we can talk about things coming up*. I wasn't sure what to say I honestly just wanted to be alone for as long as I can. *Sure I'm at an art museum, its the Museum of Contemporary Art*. I lie, I just couldn't deal with anymore of my life being ruined tonight. *Okay see you soon Lauren*. I let out a deep breath, I feel like I just escaped death. The vibration of my phone takes me out of my peaceful state

Unknown number  
Hey babe glad to see you've finally learned that you've been missing out on all this.

Wtf was this some sort of prank did a fan get my number again. Man I barely got this phone.

Lauren  
Umm you have the wrong number

Unknown number   
No I don't Lauren, management gave me your number, because I didn't have it and that sort of things vital to being your boyfriend

It was fucking brad really why is everyone trying to ruin my night.

Lauren  
Look we are not actually dating okay it PR

Brad  
Sure babe, but I'll change your mind quick see you soon 😉

What does he mean soon, I'm afraid to ask not wanting this conversation to go on any longer.

Lauren  
Whatever leave me alone

Brad  
Goodnight babe 😘

I was disgusted that I was being "paired" up with him. He was always creepy and sexist when we ran into each other. One of my friends came up to me with a guy following behind her.

Friend: Lauren I found you a new friend  
Lauren: What   
Friend: Here sit down and talk  
Lauren: Wait where are you going   
Friend: To party see yah bitch  
Guy: Sorry about this I came to hang out with my friends but this really isn't my scene  
Lauren: Me to although I'm the one who invited my friends here thinking they could lift my spirits, but no they just left me with no one, no offense   
Guy: None taken I'm just a regular guy, and your friends sound like some assholes  
Lauren: Yep they are but sometimes a need a 2d relationship   
Guy: I suppose it's better that way, no hurting people's feelings or them hurting you  
Lauren: Right! The names Lauren by the way, it's nice to meet you  
Guy: Nice to meet you Lauren, Im Blake

(A whole discussion about Grammar and 3 beers later)

Blake: Look just because your Cuban doesn't mean you can change grammar. Like who the hell say My clothes is big on me. Your friends were right  
Lauren: Whatever guess I lost round two of this debate

Blake was seriously drunk, he must've been a lightweight or something because we only had a couple beers.

Blake: You know your really great Lauren  
Lauren: Than...

*No POV*

She was cut off with a kiss from the stranger. She tasted the beer in his mouth, she didn't kiss back.

Blake: Come on Lauren have some fun

He goes in for another kiss but Lauren quickly cuts him off. He still pushes though.

Lauren: Seriously Blake leave me the fuck alone  
Blake: Come on Lauren show me your fun side

He moves his hands under Lauren's sweatshirt trying to grope her boobs. Lauren pushes him off and he lands on the floor.

Blake: Guess your not as easy as your friends told me

Lauren was shocked she looks over at her group of friends to see them looking fright back snickering.

Blake: Later Bitch

He walks away towards the group of girls. She couldn't believe what just happened, She gets up off the couch and towards the exit. Before exiting she stops in front of the door. Do I really want to go back home, I just I don't wanna go back there. A tear escapes her eye, she quickly wipes it away and puts on a fake smile. She turns around and heads back towards the bar.

Bartender: Hey are you okay, saw that asshole trying to touch you, I could call a cab if you need it.

Lauren weakly smiles at her she felt dirty and weak.

Lauren: No thanks you know how boys are when they drink, just give me some tequila

(Back in present time)

Lauren eyes watered up as she remembered everything that happened in just two hours.

Lauren: Im just tired of being used

She said in a soft voice almost as if she didn't want anyone to hear. Halsey heard her, she wrapped her hands around Lauren and pulled her in for a sweet embrace. Lauren squeezed her tight, she buried her face in the crook of Halsey's neck letting her tears stain the white shirt she was wearing.

Lauren: I'm just tired of being used, I've been through so much and I've got nothing but shit after shit back

Lauren was always open with the older girl perhaps she was tired of all the bullshit and bottling up that she needed her to escape. The liquor was definitely making it easier for Lauren to vent. Halsey knew not to speak and let the girl talk.

Lauren: I mean my grandma fucking died and nobody gives a shit, they tell me to move on and get to work. That if I think about her or don't move on it'll bring down the whole group. All I am to people is some cash cow, or a slut, or a bitch. They ....they won't even care if I died today.

Halsey rubs Lauren back as she struggles to get the words out. Her last words feel like daggers to Halsey's heart. Lauren let's out soft sobs.

Halsey: Hey its okay, its okay. Hey look at me

She brings Lauren's chin up so that their directly facing each other

Halsey: I'd miss you, and I don't think your a bitch I actually think your passionate, caring, and honesty. Your not a slut your confident, and beautiful.

Halsey slowly rubs her arm and looks down while smiling. She felt a nervousness and warmth in her heart.

Halsey: Your talented and intelligent, and I'm...really glad I met you. We've only known each other for like a week and you've already changed my life cheesy I know.

Lauren laughs and nods her head.

Lauren: Yea a little  
Halsey: hah yea I'm kind of just spewing things out right now  
Lauren: I can see that  
Halsey: I just want you to know how important you are to me...to so many other people, you life may seem like shot now but I promise you it's gonna get better

Halsey gentle takes her hand away from Lauren's chin. Throughout their conversation they inched closer to each other. Lauren was still drunk but able to understand Lauren leans in to whisper in Halsey ear.

Lauren: Why do you care so much

Halsey's heart starts to beat fast, she wasn't sure why she cared so much about Lauren. She chewed on her lip nervously.

Halsey: I dont know I just really like you

Lauren suddenly grabs Halsey's neck and kisses her. Halsey was shocked yet pleased, she wasn't sure what to do. Lauren's lips on hers felt so good but her body couldn't react. Lauren pulls away, she looks down abd bites her lip.

Lauren: Im sorry I.. I didnt   
Normani: Lauren!  
Lauren: I have to go Thank you for everything

She didn't reply to Lauren, she was still in shock. Lauren sighs and walks away almost shamefully. She gets in the car and drives away. It wasnt sure if Lauren was even going to remember this night.

*Halsey POV*

I fucked up. I can't believe she kissed me. I put my hand on my head. She kissed me.

Bartender: Wow you really messed that up  
Halsey: ughh dont remind me

I should have kissed her. I knew I felt something about her. I go back into the club to find Lido so we could leave. I find him making out with some girl on the couch.

Halsey: Wtf are you doing   
Lido: ohh babe there you are

He comes up to me and trys to place a kiss on my lips. I push him back.

Halsey: Go fuck yourself

I turn around and head out of the club. I touch my lips regretting how I wasn't able to capture the other girls lips. I get the feeling I messed up everything. Maybe Im overthinking it she probably won't even remember any of this.


	6. A Momentary Escape

*2015*

*Lauren POV*

I wake up to the sound of my alarm clock and my head pulsating. I didn't remember setting my alarm clock but I decided it was probably time to get up anyways. I head to my bathroom to find some pills waiting for my by my sink with a note.

Hey you sure did drink a lot last  
night,  
these should help. Don't worry about getting in trouble I've got it covered.   
Just get well soon   
Love Normani.

I pick up the note and hold it close to my heart Thank you. I was grateful to have such amazing friends, although we did have our fights we always knew we could come back to each other. I knew that these girls were gonna be what gets me through this. My head starts to feel like its con caving, I quickly start massaging my head hoping it would help the pain and to my luck it did and without sparing another minute I pop a pill in my mouth. I look at myself in the mirror I was in my pajamas with my face cleaned of makeup, last night seemed like one huge blur to me, I was only capable of producing short spurred memories. I remembered going to the club, running in to Halsey and her boyfriend, how I was just left behind by my friends. I start to clench my fists. How they brought some random guy over to me thinking I'd be easy and fuck him right there. I remembered how he slurred his words and how his breath reeked of alcohol as he moved closer to me. I try remember other things that had happened last night when suddenly I remembered 

*Knock Knock*

Who the hell is here at this time. I walk to the door and look through the peep hole to see Normani.

Normani: Open the door dummy   
Lauren: Okay Okay give me a second

Normani comes in and gives me a hug and squeezes me as tightly as she can.

Lauren: You know I need to breathe right?  
Normani: Not right now you don't

Normani finishes hugging me and takes a deep breathe, then out of no where she punches me in the stomach.

Lauren: Owwww...what was that for

I rub my stomach Damn she hit me hard

Normani: That's for scaring me last night now lets eat

She waves a bag of food in front of my face and heads towards my kitchen table.

Lauren: Your lucky you brought food.  
Normani: Really? What would you have done?  
Lauren: I would have kicked your ass.

I say while poking the older girls rib. She scoffed and set the bag of food down on the table.

Normani: Kick my ass Huh you sound so sure of that.... TICKLE ATTACK

I quickly run behind my couch begging Normani not to.

Lauren: No stop stop don't move   
Normani: What you said you could kick my ass. Why don't you stop being a little bitchhh

*No POV*

Normani tries to scare Lauren, she starts to make quick movements with her feet making seem like shes running towards Lauren. Normani starts to laugh as she sees the other girl start to panic.

Lauren: Normani Kordei Hamilton Stop  
Normani: Fine your no fun

Normani heads towards the table and takes a seat. Lauren was still behind the couch.

Lauren: You better not do anything  
Normani: I'm not come on lets eat

Normani smiles at Lauren and starts to pat the seat next to her. Lauren slowly get away from the couch and starts to head to the table.

Lauren: What did you get anyways

Without hesitation Normani jumps up out of her seat and sprints for Lauren. Lauren quickly starts to run away. They begin chasing each other around the couch and kitchen table.

Lauren: Normani leave me alone

Normani was to focused on catching Lauren to respond.

Lauren: Look why don't we call it a truce

Normani stops in her tracks.

Normani: Fine truce, lets shake on it  
Lauren: Hell no you've already betrayed me once.  
Normani: I guess we don't have a truce then

Normani then sprints towards Lauren. They run around the table two more times.

Lauren: Fine fine, I'll shake your hand but you better not try anything  
Normani: Why would I do such a thing

She said with an obvious sarcastic tone and a devious smile plastered on her face.

Lauren: See that type of shit doesn't make me trust you  
Normani: Oh come on and shake my hand

Lauren moves slowly towards Normani and extends her hand out trying to keep a large amount of space in between them. Normani sees her opportunity and quickly grabs Lauren's wrist and tackles her. They land on the couch, Normani quickly positions herself on top of Lauren and starts tickling her.

Lauren: Mani hahahahah Mani stop

She couldn't stop to get any words through, every time she tried to speak up Normani just tickled her more. Lauren began wiggling around hoping it would get Normani off her. 

Normani: What happened thought you said you could kick my ass  
Lauren: Mani hahaha I'm gonna pee

Despite the little lie Normani continued to tickle her.

Lauren: Okay Okay hahah Mani I give up, I cant kick your ass

Normani stops tickling Lauren and smiles at the girl under her.

Normani: Good now you know your place

Lauren laughs, it was probably the first time she truly laughed or even had fun after her grandma passed away. She actually felt normal for once.

Lauren: Thank you

Normani looked confused

Normani: Thank you for what

Lauren looked at Normani with a big grin on her face

Lauren: For making me laugh

Normani gave her a heartfelt smile and got off of her.

Normani: Come on lets eat

They move towards the table and sit down to eat breakfast. It was silent for a few minutes as the girls started to eat there breakfast. Normani was impatiently taping her finger on the table looking as if she wanted to say something. Lauren caught up quick.

Lauren: You know you can ask me anything you want  
Normani: I just don't want to bring you back into all the negatives  
Lauren: Its kinda hard not to... trust me

She continued to eat her waffles, her mind occasionally slipping back to all the negative things that took place in the matter of these three days.

Normani: Soo how was last night  
Lauren: Well since we're on the topic of negative, last night was shit  
Normani: Why? What happened  
Lauren: Just a series of unfortunate events

She played last night down even though Normani was clearly not buying it.

Normani: You know I've known you for three years now. I can tell when your bullshitting me

Lauren sighed and took one more bite of her waffles and drink of her orange juice.

Lauren: Some friends of mine thought it would be funny to bring a guy over to me and see how quick he could get in my pants. They thought I would be easy  
Normani: Lauren  
Lauren: Its okay I ended it before anything got out of hand

Lauren looked down and slowly started to eat her food again. Normani looked at her with a worried face. She couldn't believe anyone would do that to a friend.

Normani: At least Halsey was there with you  
Lauren: It was a lot of fun with her but truth be told I barely even got to talk to her, her drunk boyfriend dragged her away and I was pretty much alone the whole night. That's why I even called people to come. You know I just wanted to escape it all for one night. One fuckin night Normani but hell I couldn't, I've had management up my ass pushing me to date Brad. Brad texting me telling me how I'm gonna end up falling in love with him. My fuckin Grandma died and people are treating it like some sort of burden on their lives. I'm tired of this bullshit when am I gonna be fucking happy for once.

Lauren didn't notice how she broke her plastic fork when she was talking. She gets up and throws it away in the kitchen, while looking for another fork a tear escapes from her eye. She quickly wipes it away not wanting the older girl to see. Normani stayed at the table not knowing what to say.

Normani: Look I know your lives shit right now but its not gonna get better if you allow it to take over your life, your Grandma wouldn't want that.

Lauren faced away from the girl and looked up to the ceiling trying to stop any other tears from falling. She knew it was true her Grandma wouldn't want this she'd want her to live her life to the fullest potential, but it was still too hard to move past all this, it had its claws sinked in deep.

Lauren: I'm not letting it take over it just is, I have no control over it  
Normani: I just don't want you forgetting about all the good things in life. We'll be there for you always  
Lauren: How am I gonna get through this  
Normani: With a little help from your friends

Normani held her hand and smiled.

Lauren: What would I ever do without you  
Normani: Well lucky for you, you don't have to find out  
Lauren: I wanted to ask how did you even find me  
Normani: Oh well Halsey called me with your phone and told me you were drunk and needed to be picked up, don't you remember  
Lauren: Not really I only remembered a couple things maybe I'll remember more later on  
Normani: You really drank that much, I mean you were definitely drunk when I picked you up but I didn't think you'd forget stuff.   
Lauren: I don't know I guess the shots really had an effect on me  
Normani: You know you really shouldn't be drinking your not even old enough, swear one of these days your gonna get caught

Lauren smiles and raises her glass of orange juice

Lauren: Well till the day I get caught, lets drink like kings Cheers

Normani playfully rolls her eyes and raises her glass

Normani: Sometimes I just can't with you

*Clink*

Normani: Oh I've been meaning to tell you today we have an interview booked it's gonna be like a 30 min one too, but it's later on in the day so you have some time to recover

Lauren: Okay and then the Benefit Concerts tomorrow right

Normani: Ya its starts at around 7 but we don't go on until around 8 .... you know he's gonna be there right  
Lauren: Ugh I know don't remind me, I just have to ignore him   
Normani: It's okay Consider me your bodyguard for tomorrow night. I'll make sure nothing happens   
Lauren: Thank You I really mean it, its hard for me to express stuff sometimes but really thank you  
Normani: I know Lo

*Knock*

Lauren gets up but Normani beats her to the punch.

Normani: It's Okay I'll get it

Normani walks to the Door and looks in the peep hole. Her face didn't show any expression so Lauren couldn't tell who was on the other side.

Normani: Um give me second I just need to have a quick talk outside

Without another word Normani quickly opened the door and stepped outside to talk to the mystery person outside. Lauren was confused and curious

*Normani POV*

I quickly step outside and close the door behind me.

Normani: What do you want  
Manager: I need to talk to Lauren

Their manager tries to move past me to open Lauren's door but I block her.

Normani: Look she's finally feeling lie herself and I don't need you to come in here and ruin it  
Manager: You know I'm not trying to ruin her life, the higher ups are pissed about that interview and are making me draw the line, I've already told you why i'm always on you guys, I don't want them to interfere anymore  
Normani: What do you have to tell her

Their Manager looked at me with a bleak expression

Manager: Whats gonna happen with her and Brad

My expression drops, I knew how Lauren felt about this Brad situation and having to continue with this "Plan" would just make situations with Lauren worse.

Normani: Let me stay with her, when your telling her she needs someone there  
Manager: Normani I should really talk to Lauren alone  
Normani: Look you don't know how this Brad situation affects Lauren like I do and I know that she's not gonna be happy when she hears this. Consider me a mediator  
Manager: Fine, now can I go in  
Normani: We

I open the door and lead the way for our Manager. Lauren was sitting at the table on her phone it was shocking that she wasn't right behind the door spying on us, but she probably was then heard enough and moved to the table to take her mind off.

Normani: Hey Lauren we're all gonna go over some things

Lauren just nodded and continued looking at her phone. Normani took a seat next to Lauren and their manager on the other side of them.

Manager: Okay well lets get down to business

Lauren scoffed and I gentle hit her.

Manager: First things first where were you last night. We were supposed to talk then.

Lauren was about to speak when I blurt out what happened.

Normani: Well me and Lauren were kind of got caught up in the art and stuff and by the time we got back it was already late so we just decided to have a movie night. We thought you probably were asleep by then.  
Manager: You were with Lauren, why didn't you call and tell me where you guys were in the beginning I called you multiple time last night.   
Normani: I left my phone at the hotel, Me and Lauren just wanted a night alone you know take a break from technology  
Manager: Sureee  
Normani: Man somebody has trust issues

Lauren snickered

Normani: Seriously though why would I lie to you  
Manager: Okay okay lets move on to more important things, Lauren as you know your being paired up with Brad

Lauren smile quickly disappears, she knew this was coming up but the more they prevented the conversation the better she felt. I see her uncomfortably shift her body, I knew she hated when people even said his name out loud.

Manager: Well it's been decided that you guys start to hangout in public   
Lauren: What! I'm being forced to hangout with that douche   
Manager: We have to make it seem convincing, also when people ask who your celebrity crush is your obligated to say him.  
Normani: Really that's just pathetic  
Manager: Look you just gonna hangout with him tomorrow before the benefit  
Lauren: Just me and him  
Manager: Yes we want the spotlight on just the both of you

I watch as Lauren puts her hands on her head, the change in her attitude from when they were alone to now was remarkable. She went from happy and joyful to hopeless.

Manager: I think that's enough talking for today, I'll keep you updated

I get up to walk our manager out, Lauren stays at the table in the same position. I open the door our Manager turns back to me and whispers.

Manager: Watch over her, things are going to get worse

I nod and close the door. How could things possible get worse. I go over to Lauren and hug her from behind.

Normani: It's okay I got you  
Lauren: You know your the best  
Normani: I know I am

Lauren quickly gets up out of her chair and turns around to face me. She extends her arms out signalling me to hug her. I reciprocate and move towards her, as I got closer I felt her poke my stomach making me flinch. Taking advantage of the situation she starts to tickle me. I fall to the floor.

Normani: Lauren hahah Lauren ha Stop haha please

Lauren: I'll stop once you say that I can kick your ass any day

I couldn't stop laughing and squirming around, Tears from laughing so hard fell from my face. It was obvious Lauren was enjoying seeing me in pain.

Normani: Lauren hahah please hahaha please  
Lauren: I'm waiting  
Normani: Okay okay, You can kick my ass any day   
Lauren: There harmony is restored  
Normani: God you weren't even tickling me, you were just stabbing me with your fingers  
Lauren: That's basically what tickling is  
Normani: No it isn't   
Lauren: Yes it is  
Normani: Whatever, so I guess your okay with everything that just happened  
Lauren: I'm not okay with it but I'm just gonna take your advice not let it take over me you know

I smiled at her.

Normani: We have a couple of hours before make up what do you wanna do  
Lauren: Let watch a movie, you pick and while you do so I'm gonna take a quick shower.  
Normani: Okay do you have a certain genre in mind  
Lauren: No Romance or Rom-Coms  
Normani: Okay Miss no soul

Lauren playfully sticks her tongue out at me and goes in her room.

Normani: I'm kind of in the mood for a horror hmm let's see what we have

(30 min of trying to pick a movie)

Lauren: Can't you just hurry up and put the movie in, I don't understand how you could take so long  
Normani: Shhh I needed to pick the right movie  
Lauren: Yea and look at what you settled on... Great job  
Normani: People said it was good  
Lauren: Okayyy now lets watch the movie

(An hour and 47 min of possibly wasted time)

Lauren: Don't get it so Paul didn't have sex with the prostitutes, he and Jay are just gonna pass the sex demon between themselves and try to avoid it  
Normani: I guess so why have sex with a prostitute and have a meaningless death I mean if they die it would just come back to you  
Lauren: I guess god how stupid was Greg huh, why would you even take a chance and have sex with her  
Normani: I know right like I don't care if you were lying I wouldn't have sex with you  
Lauren: I know huh and they really thought they were gonna kill it, like come on its an entity how are you going to kill it  
Normani: I don't know

*Ding*

(New Message)

Dinah:  
*Hey you should come down and get ready for the interview get Lauren down here too*

Normani:  
*Yeah we'll be down in a bit and ps we should talk about last night*

I didn't notice Lauren was behind me the whole time looking over my shoulder until it as too late.

Lauren: Oooo What happened last night huh  
Normani: What nothing ... why are you so nosy  
Lauren: Sureee nothing happened Miss not answering her phone

She nudges my shoulder. My face starts to get hot. I quickly change the topic.

Normani: That weird I've never seen that sweat shirt before where did you get it, it was on you last night too  
Lauren: Stop trying to change the subject  
Normani: Who's sweatshirt is it Lauren is it Halsey's  
Lauren: Ya she spilled her drink on me so she gave me her sweatshirt.

I get up off the couch.

Normani: You know you can't always use that excuse  
Lauren: It's not an excuse, that's what happened  
Normani: Sure Jan  
Lauren: Stop, me and her are just friends, can't the same about you and Dinah though

I roll my eyes at the girl. Her and the Polynesian girl's relationship was more complicated then it should be.

Normani: Come on we have to go get make up done

We exit the room and start to head to where make up was. unfortunately for me Lauren refused to let go of the whole Dinah situation.

Lauren: You and Dinah huh, I always knew you kids would get together  
Normani: I'm older than you and nothing happened, your mind's just in the gutter  
Lauren: Prove me wrong then, what were you doing

Before I was able to answer a *Ding* went off in my back pocket. I knew it had to be Dinah and without a doubt Lauren knew too. The girl quickly took my phone out of my back pocket and started to run down the hallway.

Normani: Lauren! Get back here  
Lauren: Why? You shouldn't have anything to hide  
Normani: I still want my phone back

*No POV*

Lauren was just a few feet ahead of Normani. She hadn't had the chance to check the phone yet. They ran through the front lobby area moving to the other side of the hotel where the makeup room was. Their running however didn't go unnoticed.

Security: No running

Neither of them paid any attention. Lauren was focused on getting far away enough to read the text and Normani just wanted to get her hands on her phone, her mind ran though the possible texts Dinah could've sent.

Security: Damn Kids

They were nearing the makeup room, Normani was so close to Lauren but barely missed her by an inch.

Normani: Ooo Your so lucky right now

Suddenly Dinah walks out of the room, Lauren runs into her sending all the girls to tumble to the floor.

Dinah: Owww Why the hell are you guys running

Normani notices Lauren dropped the phone during the collision and picks it up.

Normani: Hah got it  
Lauren: Shit, thanks a lot Dinah  
Dinah: What did I do  
Lauren: Well according to Normani you guys did a lot  
Dinah: What

Normani quickly jumps on Lauren and covers her mouth.

Normani: Nothing she said nothing you should really go and get the others

Normani was wrestling Lauren making sure her mouth was covered. They looked like little kids.

Dinah: You guys are weird, makeups ready for you guys  
Normani: Lauren you can go first

She got off Lauren and stood by Dinah.

Lauren: Are you sure I can leave you guys alone. Don't want Dinah's makeup to get all messed up   
Dinah: What

Normani elbowed Dinah. Dinah was confused about the whole situation.

Normani: Don't entertain her she's having a weird day   
Lauren: Hey Dinah what happened last night

Dinah's heart started to race, she looked over to Normani for a signal but got nothing from her face expression.

Dinah: Umm what, Mani and me were just hanging out why  
Lauren: Hmm I'll figure it out sooner or later, you win this battle Kordei

Without another word Lauren went in the room. Dinah took a breath and looked at Normani.

Dinah: What was that about, How does she know I with you last night  
Normani: She was being nosy and looking over my shoulder while I was texting you  
Dinah: Oh but she doesn't know about  
Normani: No she doesn't, look let's talk about it later, somewhere more private

Dinah nodded in agreement and left the girl to herself. Normani sighs

Normani: God what is today

*Halsey POV*

I barely slept last night, I kept thinking about Lauren. The way she made me feel, how her lips felt and how that all went crumbling down when she walked away. I was over thinking it was she gonna hate me, will our relationship even be the same. I need to stop thinking about it. I get a call from my manager and pick it up.

*Hey what's up* I say. *Hey I'm just calling to check in and tell you about today's schedule* *Ya tell me about it* I secretly hoped not much was happening today, I wanted today to be a sort of mental break for me. *Well your lucky you only have a small interview today* I felt relieved. *Thank god* *Don't be Thanking anyone yet, tomorrow's a packed day, you'll have to get up early and plan for the day. Also your sound check is at 1:00 for the Benefit Concert* I didn't realize the concert had already caught up. *Shit I didn't realize that was tomorrow* * Well surprise it is and your gonna be going on after Fifth Harmony but there's a little intermission so you'll have time to prepare* Why was I forgetting everything lately, Fifth harmony's gonna be there, I'm gonna see Lauren. Shit what if things are awkward or I don't know what am I gonna do *Helllooo you there Ashley* *Yeah I was just thinking, sounds great come and get me a few minutes before the interview* *Okay see you then Bye* *Bye*

Okay okay Ashley calm down no need to make a big deal out of this. Forget it I already did make a big deal out of it, to late to turn back now. She probably thinks I don't like her, what should I say to her. Should I text her, no I probably shouldn't. I glance down at my phone, I knew I shouldn't but this one mistake couldn't ruin things with her and Lauren. Fuck it. I write a quick message to test the waters. I delete the text and rewrite it, then read over it over 10 times making sure there wasn't any spelling mistakes. My finger stays hovering over the send button, I was already rethinking the whole message. Come on come on hit the damn button. I hit it quick and throw my phone on my couch. Aaaahh what did I do.

Halsey:  
*Hey hope you got home safe. Yesterday was a lot of fun even though I barely got to see you, but we should really hangout again. Can't wait to see you tomorrow.*

(30 min pass)

I have been left on read for the past 30 minutes now, I never get left on read in fact I'm the one to leave people on read. Shit. She's probably is mad at me, I ruined our friendship. Before I could think anymore my phone vibrated. It had to be Lauren my stomach felt like it was doing flips. I pick it up and turn my phone over to see the text. Fuck.

(New Message)

Cricket:  
*Got it. This is Cricket confirming we received your $75 payment for account 654748893. Did you know that you can manage your account at cricketwireless.com?*

Fucking Cricket got all my hopes up. I roll my eyes and throw my phone back on couch. My phone vibrates again. I pick up my phone not getting my hopes up. It was Lauren.

(New Message)

Lauren:  
*Hey got home safely also had lots fun with you too, I really want to talk to you tomorrow. Let's meet up sometime during the concert.*

I felt nervous, what could she possible want to to talk about. It had to be the kiss. I text back as soon as possible because I knew I didn't have the will power to wait any longer.

Halsey:  
*Ya totally can't wait to see you.*

Lauren:  
*Well till then*

*No POV*

The girls head into the interview. The interview was a young woman, who was genuinely nice. She explained to the girls how the interview gonna work.

Interviewer: We'll do 10 min of talking about you guys then will switch to a game for another 10 min and then end this all with some fan questions. Sounds good?

All the girls nodded and smiled, they were happy the interviewer was also having a great time it allowed the girls to take this less serious. They take a seat on the couch Lauren next to Normani next to Dinah then Camila and Ally at the end. Lauren occasionally "accidentally" bumped into Normani so that she would bump into Dinah as well. She loved to tease them, she knew there were some sort of feelings deep down but they didn't want to admit it.

(First 10 min)

They talked about how amazing the tour has been and how fun its been to travel to so many new places and see fans they wouldn't normally see. They also talked about new music and a new album in the works. Most time was spent getting side tracked about different things that happened while on tour.

(Second 10 min)

They move to the game portion of the interview, the interviewer set up a game of Most likely to, there was even paddles with their faces on them.

Interviewer: Most likely to stage dive.

Ally and Normani put up Lauren's face while Camila, Dinah and Lauren put up Camila's face.

Lauren: I would not stage dive, I don't want random people touching my body  
Camila: See with me they don't have anything to grab onto

We all laughed it was sort of true.

Interviewer: Okay who's most likely to end up in Jail

In a second everyone lifted up Lauren's face, even Lauren lifted up her own face.

Lauren: Yep I expected that  
Interviewer: What would you get arrested  
Lauren: Nothing bad but I'm kind of the reckless and I'm a don't follow rules kind of person.  
Interviewer: Most likely to Get away with Murder

They all thought for a bit. Lauren, Normani and Camila hold up Ally's paddle. While Dinah and Ally hold up Lauren's.

Normani: It's obviously Ally, who would even expect her.  
Dinah: Yea but if they do expect her she would crack under pressure  
Normani: Their not gonna expect her though

Ally was an angel in everyone's eyes, she helped at charities and had good morals. No one would expect her to do such a thing.

Dinah: Okay well I choose Lauren because she watches a lot of murder shows and she also has a pretty good poker face.  
Lauren: This is true, you know what I'll kill them with you ally   
Ally: I'm not going to be killing anyone

The girls laughed they probably should have expected Ally say something along those lines.

Dinah: See she wouldn't even be able to do it  
Camila: But she already did, who would get away with Murder  
Dinah: But she would just feel guilty after and turn herself in, see Lauren would probably kill then, hide her tracks and get away.  
Interviewer: Okay enough murder talk. who's most likely to win any competition they were put in.

They all put up Dinah's head and agree with the results.

Lauren: Yea definitely Dinah she's good at like everything.  
Normani: She's also the most athletic in the group.  
Camila: We all suck at sports and running stuff.

Dinah nodded.

Normani: Guy's I didn't get one what would I be mostly likely to do   
Dinah: Most likely to be a Diva

Everyone laughed and Normani lightly hit the girl

Normani: That's not true  
Lauren: It is, your so picky  
Ally: And she always makes sure she has the right lighting for pictures.  
Interviewer: It seems like the jury has decided, Normani you are a Diva

The girls start to slow clap for Normani.

(Last 10 Minutes)

During the last part of the interview they went live and answered basic fan questions like whats your favorite song to preform and if we could collab with anyone who would it be. They were all having fun these were one of those rare interviews that were fun and allowed the girls to be themselves. They were nearing the end of the interview with one more question left.

Interviewer: Okay last question from HarmoLyfe, Who are you yall's celebrity crushes

Lauren's heart sank she knew that she couldn't avoid the question the interviewer allowed everyone to answer the question. Just when she thought this day was getting good something happens. Normani could see the change in Lauren's face, she wasn't smiling any longer.

Dinah: I don't know probably some foot player  
Camila: Definitely Spiderman  
Ally: I really don't have a crush on anyone, I more so get starstruck  
Normani: I really have to think about it, I mean I definitely think people are attractive but hmm let me think of a name...maybe

Normani was just stalling time hoping that they run out of time before they get to Lauren.

Interviewer: Oh it looks like we're out of time hopefully you think of your celebrity crush later.

Normani was relieved when she called time.

Interviewer: You know what I noticed that Lauren you didn't answer, give us a quick little answer

Shit Normani said in her head she felt bad that she couldn't protect the Dark haired girl from the question.

Lauren: I think my celebrity crush is um... probably Brad from the Vamps

All the girls but Normani looked shocked. They knew about Brad and how he could be so they were shocked she'd label him as her celebrity crush.

Interviewer: Ooo he was on tour with you guys with you, any chance this might happen  
Lauren: I don't know were just friends right now  
Interviewer: Well thank you guys for coming, Ladies and gentlemen Fifth Harmony and catch the full interview on Monday

Lauren was glad the interviewer didn't pry, like others would do. She had an awful taste in her mouth from the words she spitted out. They all said there goodbyes to the interviewer and Lauren decided to go relax back in room while the other girls hung out.

*Ding*

(New Message)

Brad:  
*Saw your interview that was so sweet of you babe, I'm your Celebrity crush*

Lauren:  
*Shut up I was forced to say that*

Brad:  
*Didn't look like it, but whatever helps you sleep at night Darling. Oh and I can't wait for our date tomorrow *

She ignored him, God how she hated him with a passion, He put up this act of a sweet boy but really he was a sexist Dick. I decide to take my mind off things by going on twitter. My messages were blowing up with people saying they ship us. I thought it was disgusting if only they knew the truth. I look on my timeline to see a tweet from Brad.

Brad: Lauren Jauregui 😍😘❤️

Lauren already felt like she was getting a headache from all this. What the fuck am I gonna do tomorrow.


	7. Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah now after this I was struck with a major creative drought

*Trigger Warning*

*Lauren POV*

I wake up feeling sick, I immediately run out of my bed and go to throw up. It felt like I was going through an everlasting loop of emotions. I was feeling anxious, furious and Nauseous which ultimately is what ended up with my head first in the sink. I shouldn't be making a big deal out of these plans with Brad, I knew I wouldn't let things get anywhere between us but knowing the devious boy he always had something planned.

(10 min away from plans with Brad)

Manager: Okay Lauren you guys will just be going to the mall and shopping around. Then you'll eat there too, hopefully, people will recognize you both and the media will pick up on it.  
Lauren: God this is so stupid, you're lucky I'm going shopping.  
Manager: Look I know that you don't want to do this but it's important that you two look like your getting along. If you mess this up you'll just get yourself in bigger trouble, think of the group.  
Lauren: Don't involve the group into this Okay! They don't need to involved in this shit show.  
Manager: And I don't want to involve them but you know I don't have any control over label or you.  
Lauren: I'll behave okay, I...I just want to get this over with.

(2 minutes away from plans with Brad)

I finished getting dressed I put on a t-shirt with plain black jeans. My mentality had changed from nervous and anxious to just wanting to get this over with. *knock knock* I get up off my couch and move to see who was knocking, it was Normani.

Normani: Hey how are you doing uh are you ready for today.  
Lauren: Yup totally ready, can't wait Oo I'm so excited.

I said with a wide smile and a chipper attitude then ending with a plain face that said Really Bitch. She must have got the message when she let out a light chuckle and nodded her head

Normani: Yeah I should have guessed that, but at least you getting free shit out of it, make those bastards pay

I let out a small laugh and shook my head. Of course, the darker skinned girl would try to cheer her up.

Lauren: Yup looks like I'm having a shopping spree buttt I also have to do that a total tool so that sucks.

Normani: Yeah can't really escape that one but hey just focus on the free shit you'll get.  
Lauren: Yeah I guess materialistic happiness will have to do it today huh. I'm honestly just not gonna talk to him the whole time so I'm not sure what they were expecting.

Normani let's out a little laugh and shakes her head.

Normani: Of course. He doesn't deserve to talk to you that creepy Bastard ugh I still can't believe out of all the guys they could "buy" they chose him like damn they must really be old if they are that blind.

*No POV*

Lauren laughs and nods in agreement

Lauren: I knowww like wtf him like whyyy I don't get it. They just don't know the fucking real him.  
Normani: I know Hun but I'm going with you at least until you go over to the dark side.   
Lauren: Hey no, don't ruin the dark side for me.

They both laugh and Normani playfully hits her.

Normani: Oh shut up you and I both know you nothing but a soft geek.

Lauren gasps and punches Normani's arm

Lauren: Omg not even. Stop trying to ruin my bad girl and mysterious reputation.

Normani rolls her eyes and lets out a chuckle

Normani: You do know that it's just us here right?

Lauren looks around exaggeratedly and leans into Normani and whispers lightly.

Lauren: There always watching.  
Normani: Omg shut up nerd.  
Lauren: I am nottt.  
Normani: Sure Jan.  
Lauren: Did you just Sure Jan me? again!

They both laugh hard and Normani nods.

Normani: I did. I did.   
Lauren: Whyyyy. First of all, I'm not Jan. Second I'm not a nerd and Third just because you stayed up all night when I told you I was bisexual to research lgbtq+ which you didn't you just went on Tumblr and saw that doesn't mean you can constantly use it on me.  
Normani: It's relevant nowww and it's hilarious.

Lauren shakes her head still smiling at the fact her friend just Sure Jan'd her. Their Manager walks in and tells Lauren it was time to go. She nods at her and both her and Normani go to walk to the car.

Normani: Are you nervous?   
Lauren: It's not a date and it won't go anywhere.   
Normani: I know, but we both know him, he's disgusting he plays dirty. he'll try something. You must know that right?

Lauren let's out a sigh and looks out the window

(2014 at the End of Fifth Harmony's set on Demi Lovato's tour)

*Lauren's POV*

Tonight's energy was through the roof. The crowd was absolutely electric and completely energized us. Normally we'd all go back and be pretty exhausted but tonight was different. There was something in the air, it gave me such a high. I was completely energized the other girls however didn't feel as energized as me, they gave me crazy looks like I was bouncing off the walls or something. It felt like I went though a total mood change and now was completely intoxicated by the fans cheers and screams. It felt so good, I hadn't felt this alive in forever. I exited the room and moved to the back to get air, it was too closed off and hot here. I needed to be somewhere open, my energy wasn't dying down at all so I felt it was best to move away from the girls my high energy wasn't received well by the semi-tired girls. Walking through the halls I was starting to feel more than before, I didn't quite understand it but I wasn't complaining either. I got outside and felt the cool air against my skin it sent chill and a shock all throughout my body. I leaned against the wall it was also cold and affected my body in a way it probably shouldn't. I felt sudden dizziness and almost lost my balance against the wall I felt hands against my hips helping me up.

Brad: Hey are you okay.  
Lauren: Yeah just got a little dizzy or something.  
Brad: Well good thing you had a man like me to help an attractive lady like you huh.

I always hated brad he stood against everything I've ever believed. He was misogynistic, homophobic and had little respect for anyone. He viewed himself than better than all that he was the most attractive guy and that is was a privilege to be with him. He's asked me out or rather one of his goons which were just one of the other members in his band. I said no obviously I'd rather be single for life than date him. He didn't take that well he often spread lies about me saying I slept with him and let all his goons have a go at me. It was disgusting not many believed him and I thanked God for that. All the girls on tour with us knew about Brad and his gang, everyone else, however, didn't Brad was friendly with the guys and made sure to keep his pretty sweet boy reputation intact in public. But we all knew who he was. I snapped out of my thoughts when I suddenly light-headed. Brad catches me again I hated feeling his slimy hands on me. I was feeling my conscience starting to slip, I was getting a little dizzy and was losing sense of what was happening.

Brad: You know Lauren you seem a little off you okay.

He touched my arm and rubbed it slowly for some reason it gave me chills and a weird sensation.

Lauren: Wtf ugh why's everything so weird.  
Brad: I don't know baby but I've been meaning to tell you.

He bit his lip and me and starred up and down my body. I felt a mixture of emotions, I was anxious, confused and oddly aroused. I'd never been that way towards him. I clutched my head when I felt the sudden urge to faint. He caught me once again this time pressing his body against mine.

Lauren: What are you doing?! Get off me Brad!

I said it frantically, I was feeling too weak to fight back. My body felt like puddy against his. He started grinding into me, in my head I hated it and was panicking but everything else was reacting differently I started groaning and leaning into him.

Brad: Atta girl come here, Ha this is turning out better than imagined.   
Lauren: What's happening, why?  
Brad: You should really watch your drink babe, someone could slip something in. God, you feel so great against me.  
Lauren: Please stop, please.   
Brad: Oh Please baby you're enjoying it just as much.

He pushed himself on me more and moved his hand. I could feel it trailing down to pants. I took all that I had in my current lucid state and grabbed him the collar of his leather jacket and pushed him off. I began stumbling towards the back door, I was still feeling dizzy and was shaken up, whatever he gave me wasn't slowing down its effect on me. I open the door to find James on the other side he pushes me back out I almost fall until I feel my back run into someone it was Tristan. Wtf I was completely surrounded, Brad was picking himself up he was fuming and cussing.

Brad: Fucking Whore who do you think you are to just deny me. Fucking bring her I'll show her what she's missing.

Tristan grabbed me tight, he was definitely leaving marks on my wrists. He took me over to Brad and I stared right in his eyes with fear and anger. Few tears ran I knew what was going to happen. He smiled at me, it was one devilish and haunting. Tristan took me and bent me over, I heard the unzipping of Brad's pants.

(Earlier that night)

*Normani's POV*

I watched Lauren go out of the room, she was smiling and pumped up for some reason. The crowd was amazing tonight but she was never usually like this is was always Ally or Dinah on occasion but never her she was always pretty mellow. I was confused as her best friend and the closes to her I knew this wasn't her maybe I was just overreacting I couldn't tell. I drank some of my water while continuing to look at the empty corridor that peaked out of the door crack. I brush it off. She was probably getting are maybe to brush of her weird mood, well weird to us. 10 min passed and I started getting worried I stayed in that room staring at the hallway waiting for Lauren to come back, I occasionally looked up to say bye to one of the girls as the head out to the Tour Bus. It was just me and Dinah left together we talked about nonsense and laughed she often made me laugh and relax when I needed it and this was definitely one of those moments. She yawned. I looked away from the hallway and straight at her.

Normani: Tired?   
Dinah: A little but I want to stay here with you.  
Normani: I know I was having a lot of fun too um together just us.

We look at each other but I pull away from the gaze and look back towards the hallway. My feeling or whatever they were for Dinah were complicated. I-I couldn't explain it but I knew I shouldn't act on it. I cleared my throat.

Normani: You should sleep I'm just gonna wait for Lauren so yeah.   
Dinah: uh yeah I should probably get going and head to bed. Update me when Lauren comes alright.  
Normani: Will do   
Dinah: Night Normani   
Normani: Night Dinah

She leaves the room and I slump back on the couch and hold onto my head.

Normani: Ughh Normani Kordei Hamilton what are you going to dooo

I was interrupted by the only decent Vamp Connor, he came in the room urgently.

Connor: Have you seen Lauren?!

He was a bit out of breath like he's just been running.

Normani: Uh no but she went that way. Why what's happening.

He quickly looked down the hallway and looked back at me and gulped.

Connor: Come with me I'll explain not the way.

We went running down the hallway

Normani: Wait they what!?  
Connor: They drugged her a couple of hours before your set, slipped some ecstasy in her drink and she drank it. Its probably why she was so energetic. It lasts sometimes trust me your drinks aren't safe around him. Anyways I just found out over hear James talking about it. The side effects are probably setting in about now. We need to hurry.   
Normani: What side effects? Why did they drug her? Wtf is happening?!  
Connor: Fucking Brads always had his eyes on her, such a fucking creep. I think he was gonna try something today Idk, I'm not apart of this.   
Normani: You better not be or I'll kick your ass

We reached the back door after searching the rooms along the way I hear Lauren and quickly open the door full force. It hits Tristan knocking him to the ground. I see something that makes my gut turn, I didn't think much and saw Connor tackles James to the ground.

Brad: Wtf are you doing!  
Connor: You're a Fucking disgusting Human being

I ran up to Brad his pants zipper was down and I knew if we didn't get here sooner something awful would have happened to basically my baby sister. It filled me with rage.

Normani: Hey Brad Fuck You

He turns around confused and I punch him right in the nose then hit him again with a right hook. He falls to the floor holding his nose that was now gushing out blood.

Brad: What's with you fucking whores

With that he runs away with his other goons, I almost ran after them until I heard sobbing. I look down to the floor and see Lauren there in the Fetal position shaking and crying. I go to comfort her but she quickly pulls back.

Lauren: Ddddon't don't touchh me ppplease   
Normani: I got you Sis it's okay I've got you. I kneeled down by her and put my jacket on her. You're safe now I got you baby girl.   
Lauren: I I I   
Normani: It okay I've got you.  
Lauren: I was drugged Mani

She choked up and I started to feel my own tears trickle down.

Normani: I know sis .. I know.. I'm here. I'm so sorry I should have done something. I should have came to check up on you I

I was cut off by Laurens shaking body, she wrapped her arms around me.

Lauren: Pppromise to ppprotect me and I'll dddo tthe same

I looked at her in shock and finally nodded my head and reciprocated the hug.

Normani: I promise   
Lauren: I promise

We stayed there hugging another with leaning our heads against eachother.

(Present)

*Lauren's POV*

Normani: He hurt you last time you guys were alone, you were in tears, fucking shaking, your wrists were bruised. You were scarred you can't even be in crowds anymore without getting anxiety or thinking your going to be ambushed

I winced at everything she said and a tear fell from my eye. Normani noticed and immediately calmed down.

Normani: Sorry Laur I just really hate him I know you don't like going back to it.  
Lauren: Yeah.. it still hurts a little.  
Normani: I know it does, I'll try not getting to heated and open up anymore wounds.  
Lauren: Thank you, I won't let him get the best of me. I I won't let it happen. I have you to protect me this time I know if anything goes wrong you'll be there.  
Normani: Always Sis. I promised   
Lauren: And so do I so don't be so closed up with me, now tell me what's with you and Dinah?

Normani takes a long sigh

Normani: It's nothing really nothing, I like dudes I know I do ...   
Lauren: Yeahhh and you can like both like me, but pussy is way better  
Normani: I'm seeing a guy   
Lauren: We both know you never see a guy you just hook up with them for some reason. Tell me what happened.   
Normani: It didnt mean anything, I shouldn't have let it get out of hand

(Yesterday)

*Normani's POV*

I went back to my room after the interview, it was fun I was glad I could see Lauren escape for a little but it eventually came crushing down like everything else in the girls life. It made me sad, I was here I couldn't take at least some of her pain away. I'd do anything to just carry some of her weight, I'm here nothing just living while watching my sister, best friend. I promised her I'd protect her and I can't do Jack shit. I move to the kitchen and take out a bottle of whiskey, it was a birthday gift, might as well use it now. I pop off the top and take a swig. God its strong. Life isn't fair, mine doesn't but people around me do and yeah I mean I have stuff happening and stuff going on but it isn't bad. Ha Im suppose to protecting her and I just see her suffering everyday, I'm shit. I take another swig from the bottle and wince at the taste. I can already feel it affecting me. I slump down on the floor and lay my back against the wall. Drinking till I feel less guilty.

(15 min later)

I'm not a light weight so it took me awhile to get drunk. Yes even with whisky, I tried not getting fully drunk but I'm definently feeling it. I slowly pick myself up off the floor and move to the couch. I turn on the Tv and put on the only movie that can lift my mood and make me forget as much as this alcohol.

(30 min later)

Normani: And I'll make a man out of youuuu

I continued to bounce up and down the couch and sang along to the Disney tune. I was taking light sips of the whiskey throughout the movie and was definently drunker than before. Before getting to the final push of the song my phone rings.

Normani: Nooo it's was getting to the best fucking part, she was gonna be on top the thingy.

I pick up the phone and Answer *Hey Mani what are you up to I'm bored af* it was Dinah and I immediately felt little butterflies. Truth is I had complicated feelings so the younger girl. But it wasn't likely I liked guys and yes I could like girls too but that's just not me. I'm straight totally *Mani? You good* I jolted a little and quickly got my shit together *Yeahhh uh everything together here* I mentally facepalmed way to hide the fact you're drunk. *Are you Normani Kordei getting drunk without me oh hell no I'm heading over right now* My heart began racing, God what's happening. *Nooooo all goood here no need to ruin the funn* *Excuse me bish I am the fun I'm at the door open it, if you even get up* I groaned at the thought at the fact of having to get up out of my comfortable position. *Dinahhhh I can't get uppp too badd* *Oh please get your ass up and open this door* I let out a small mumble and get off the couch and wobble towards the door. I miss the handle a couple times but finally got it after the 3rd try. I see the Polynesian girl waiting on the side leaning on the hallway wall looking down at her phone. I sighed she was stunning mad always, I quickly shake that out my head. I'm straight this is just appreciating a friends looks. Dinah hasn't noticed thank God. I mentally prepare myself and get ready to say something.

Normani: Hey bitch I wouldn't have opened the door if you weren't gonna come in.

She finally looks up and gives me a smile. God I swear I'm not supposed to be feeling this way. She moves towards me and Im stuck in a trance.

Dinah: Were you playing on moving out of the doorway and letting me into your super cool club bouncer, or did I have to find me own way in.

She gave me a little smirk and looked me straight in the eyes. I felt the urge to look at her lips and back up lean in and kiss her but no I can't do that. I'm not gay what's happening is this the whisky what's happening. Dinah clears her throat and I immediately snap out of whatever I was in, I wasn't sure what I was doing I might have been biting my lip looking at her God what if I was. Fuck I'm too drunk for this. She moves past me and I close the door. We both go to the couch and slump down.

Dinah: Whiskey really someone must be having a day   
Normani: You have no idea

Dinah takes a drink and shutters

Dinah: Ugh that's awful   
Normani: It's goood  
Dinah: No honey it doesn't, did you want to talk about your day or at least the reason why your drinking.

She takes another drink of the whisky receiving the same reaction as the first. Dinah didn't take alcohol as well as I did so she was already tipsy after two swigs.

Normani: No not really, you see I kinda decided to drink to forgett.   
Dinah: Right, start this movie again   
Normani: You're lucky I love this movie and you're pretty cool   
Dinah: Aw you called me cool I'm touched Kordei

I roll my eyes and smile, that was only the beginning of how I feel. This wasn't going to end well.

(10 min until the end of the movie)

We were both pretty drunk, Dinah had no problems catching up to me and passing me in drunkness. We surprisingly kept our slurred words to a medium.

Dinah: Omg it's gonna be overfd Mulan to the rescueee  
Normani: Sheee Always saves the day bitchh

Dinah: Obviously she's Mulannn, she's so pretty mann  
Normani: Slow down there Jane she's just a character ina disney movie  
Dinah: Too Baddd she's hot   
Normani: I was always more into real people   
Dinah: Mmmm Looking at anyone particular

She had no idea that I've been looking at her this whole time, I wasn't sure what I felt for her, I was more than a little confused and a part of me wanted to forget about all this just stick with hookups no feelings but she always had a way to keep pulling me back in. This alcohol made it nearly impossible to escape my feelings, I wonder if she felt the same. I remember when Dinah came to me and told me she liked girls I was so proud of her and I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel the urge to admit my feelings to her but I didn't I thought it was just a phase. that this would pass. It didn't months went by and I still felt this for her, I started hooking up with guys in hope they would take my mind off her and sometimes they did not for long. My crush started getting not so innocent, sometimes I'd get want her to be the one touching me and during sex, I'd close my eyes and imagined myself. I would get my mind away from there and try to focus on the guy with me but she was always in the back of my head.

Dinah: Youuu zone out a lot  
Normani: Sorry thinking, are you looking at anyone specific   
Dinah: No no nooo I asked you first   
Normani: Ughh fine maybe but I'm not sure. You're turn   
Dinah: Thattt was barely anythingg give me a name   
Normani: What no way you give me a name 

My heart started to race fast, I was expecting the conversation to take this turn. Before I had time to think about what I was going to say next my phone rang. It was over by Dinah and I already knew this wasn't gonna go well. I quickly get it but she beats me and picks it up *Hellooo who is this* *What do you mean who is it, it's Terry I'm the guy from last night* he let out a small chuckle *You know the guy* I watched as Dinah was on the phone and the expressions she was probably talking to some guy I've hooked up with, they weren't always the best guys or smartest but I wanted to push these feelings down so I used them, well they definitely got more out of it then me but it was the life I created I suppose. She hung up the phone and looked at me, I almost felt ashamed when she did I got up and went to the kitchen to get some water to sober up I felt a little bit going away but I still had a medium buzz. She follows me up and leans against the counter by me.

Dinah: So whose Terry, is he who you're interested in?  
Normani: You're starting to sound less drunk  
Dinah: I'm still super drunk tho and that call woke me up little. Are you seeing that guy?  
Normani: I'm not, not at all ew, he was just a hookup some things are easier that way.  
Dinah: Why are you hooking up with douchy guys you can get any guy you want.

The alcohol must have given more courage then I needed cause I felt my control start to slip.

Dinah: Mani why those guys, You can get so much better ones.  
Normani: I don't want better ones for fuck sake I want you!

There was silence after I said it out loud, I was in shock I've had myself in control for so many months just to slip now, I started to move towards the front door when I was cut off by Dinah.

Dinah: Say that again, Tell me what you said.  
Normani: No it was a mistake I shouldn't have drank.  
Dinah: It's okay it is.  
Normani: No its not! I'm not into girls! I don't like that okay it's just the alcohol, I need to go.  
Dinah: Why are you running if it's just the alcohol?

I look up at her soft eyes and sigh 

Normani: I shouldn't feel this way about you.  
Dinah: And I shouldn't feel the same 

I didn't expect her too, I looked back into her eyes and down to her lips, she was wearing a little smirk as if she was proud to have said it. I'm so fucked with this girl. I took all the courage I had left and listened to my gut. I leaned forward into her lips and kissed her. Her lips were soft and plump they tasted like cherries which I thought was only a stereotype created by Katy Perry but turns out it's true. I liked it, It was odd so different from the guy's I've kissed but I loved it. I loved the way her lips tasted and felt on mine it was almost intoxicating. She took the liberty to tilt her head and deepen the kiss. I reciprocated, we often alternated moving our heads tilting to one side going deeper than the other and doing the same. She put her hand on my neck to guide me during the kiss, I haven't this much passion and emotion in a kiss in so long. She was the first in awhile. She broke away first and I immediately missed her lips, I wanted more.

Dinah: Wow, I've .. I've wanted that for awhile now  
Normani: Me too, It was better than I expected   
Dinah: Yah it

I cut her off with my lips and push her against the wall, I felt her lightly moan in my mouth and I felt a rush. I went deeper in the girls mouth, I already slipped might as well fully express myself. I've wanted the girl for so long. I move away from her mouth and start kissing her neck sucking and leaving light bites every once and awhile.

Dinah: Aaare you sure Mani, Fuck that feels so good

I don't reply and just lift up her shirt to see her body I bit my lip I knew I wanted this, her, for so long. I go back to her neck and whisper

Normani: I've wanted you forever 

I could tell it sent shivers down the girls back and turned her on.

Dinah: Little overdressed there

She points at my shirt and I chuckle and take off my own shirt, she licks her lips and it drives me crazy. I move forward and press myself against her and start to kiss her more hard and deep. She grabbed a fistful of my hair and pushed me into her mouth, I let out my own little small moan. I started to let my hands roam all over the girl's body, I felt her abs and reached the top of her pants. 

Dinah: How far were you planning on going   
Normani: As far as you let me

I started unzipping her pants when she stopped me. I looked at her with a puzzled look. She leans into me and moves close to my ear, I can feel her lower lip touch it.

Dinah: Invite me to your room, I'll show you how better I am than Terry 

I got turned on and smiled and nodded I touch her hand and lead her to my room, I looked back to see her taking off her pants slow, every second uncovering a new part of her toned legs. I bit my lip once more turned around and closed the door. Tonight was going to be fun. 

(Present) 

*Lauren's POV*

Lauren: OMGGGG you guys slept together!!!  
Normani: Keep your voice low bitch, anyways I woke up before her and panicked got some clothes and left for 5 hours, she was blowing up my phone asking. I finally texted her saying it was a mistake and I shouldn't have that I was drunk.  
Lauren: Bitch why would you do that you guys like each other, didn't you feel anything  
Normani: Exactly I felt too much I'm not ready to confront my feelings I need time to think.  
Lauren: I get it, I always got you It's okay sis  
Normani: Feelings suck   
Lauren: Trust me I know 

Before the girl could ask me a million questions and my recent statement the car stops. We were here it was time to have a "date" with Brad. I stepped out the car with Mani and looked over to Brad he was facing the opposite way but then turned to around, my heart dropped and my hands started to get sweaty when I saw he was wearing the same Leather jacket from the night. He notices me looking at it and gives me the same devilish grin, a feel a same tear come out. Not again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a lot of grammatical mistakes I promise I'm like semi better.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey so this is my first fanfic so don't judge me on how bad it is. I'll try and update whenever I get a chance. And if you have and suggestions on fics to write or anything please tell me. Thanks for reading.  
> Ps: There's gonna be spelling/grammatical mistakes I can't help it. And also if you see ** that usually symbolizes something happening over phone or the pov. I don't know how to bold on this platform lol


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